Absurdity of the Sexual Harassment Syndrome

Here is what REAL WOMEN do when someone comes forth with some gesture or verbal sexual harassment.
WE HANDLE IT! We don’t hold it in, then tattle and sue. We open our mouths and say, “Knock it off. What you are saying (or doing) is BS and I will not tolerate it.” Or we say loudly, “You are a pig and I expect you to quit oinking at me and keep your filthy hands to yourself!” Or however you want to handle it, but certainly not taking it in quietly and then suing.

I do remember a few times I had to handle sexual harassment (though I didn’t know what it was called then), when I was in the working force. One afternoon when I met my girlfriend at the local pub to have a beer and at that time, a cigarette. It was a small pub and so we ordered a couple of beers and took them to a table.

I reached into my purse to grab a match and found I hadn’t brought any with me. My girlfriend hadn’t either, so I went up to the bar, put one knee on a stool and reached for a pack of matches.

Somebody bit me in the butt. Without hesitation I backhanded the guy and he went flying into the wall
behind me. I didn’t know marshal arts or self defense at that time, but I knew no one should have done
that and I just reacted.

When I turned I saw a fellow picking up broken eye glasses. I recognized him. It was someone I had casually met a few months earlier. I said angrily, “Why did you bite my butt?”

He just said, “I couldn’t resist. I’m sorry.”

“Well, I didn’t mean to break your glasses, but if you ever find yourself near me again you had better use
a bit of self control” I responded (settling down a bit.)

There is NO excuse for sexual harassment – from either gender, to either gender. It is an invasion of
privacy and space, and should not be tolerated. Of course I wouldn’t recommend slugging someone all the time. That guy could have been someone who might have actually responded with violence.

But there are ways to handle it without having to sue someone for sure. I’ve known a few women who have actually opened the door to harassment by flirting or dressing way too sexy for the work place. I have found with the male gender, if you give any indication that there is opportunity, you may have to “handle” their response. Men are visual creatures usually, whereas women take a bit more prodding to get to the sexual part of the conversation or action… that’s just the basic nature of the genders.

I KNOW I can’t speak for everyone, so a reminder – I am only speaking from my point of view, lots of experience, and from the things I have seen and heard over 20+ years of counseling women. Basically I
just feel everyone is capable (perhaps not experienced), but capable of handling these situations.

We have so many things our overloaded court system is in the midst of, and this is one thing that can be
handled by the two people involved. Of course if it continued and became frightening, then someone absolutely should know (tell someone else the first time so you have a witness, if needed). But I’ve found over the years, and heard it from many women, that once you stand up and face the situation honestly,
90% of the time it’s a done deal!

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