A Couple of Relationship Tips for Men and Women

I’ve had good relationships, and relationships from hell!  My husband and I are still in love (a great relationship) after twenty-five years. M&M Christmas 2010

By the way…since this photo my husband and I have both lost weight, therein our double chins!  We are on a mission, together, to NOT GET THINNER, but to get HEALTHIER.  Much easier when you work as a team.  My vanity (what I have left) made me tell you this!

So here are a couple of tips I wanted to share.
They are valuable, and I care!My husband and I have been married VERY happily for twenty-five years.  Part of the reason is communication.  Not just that either of us talks – but we LISTEN to each other, and actually are open enough to assimilate shared thoughts.

Here is a tip for you guys.  WATCH your words to your lady, wife, girlfriend, guy friend, partner – whom ever you are in a relationship with, and one that you want to last.

Women (and I truly don’t know if gay men think in these terms, so you’ll have to know your mate to decide) LISTEN TO EVERY WORD THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH.  They don’t just listen.  They REMEMBER.  Even if you immediately say

“Sorry” or “Didn’t mean it”, whatever – it stays with women for a long, long time.

You know you don’t want your words imprinted on her heart, or dissected like a frog in a lab, or worse yet, thrown in your face a thousand times.  We can’t help it.  We listen, and most of us have just a tad or jealousy, or perhaps insecurity, so we tend to believe what you say.

That’s why women are said to “hear what they want to hear”.  Women can be gullible too.  That’s why some con artists are able to worm their slimy way into a woman’s heart.

It’s as simple as that.  REALLY.  THINK before you speak, and no matter how difficult it may be at first, WATCH YOUR WORDS…particularly if you love this person!

You do not want to scar her heart.  You do not want to wind up saying, “Oh I knew you’d bring this up again, and again, and again. 

Just pick your words as you would pick a weapon.  Make them appropriate and use them with decorum.  Just get it the habit and you will reap the rewards!

Here is a tip for you gals.  When your dispute is over, DROP IT!  Goes back to that elephant like memory we have sometimes.  DROP IT.  Get over it.  Let it RIP.

A guy hates to munch on what is in the past, and for a guy, when the dispute is over – it is OVER!  Let it go.  You are not only “bringing up the past” (even if it was just solved), but you are racking your relationship over hot coals.  It doesn’t prove anything or make you the winner if you can’t “get on with your life”.  It makes you waste any chance you have to really start working on your relationship in the current state.

Besides, if YOU don’t let it go, long past the fight, long past the time of dissention, YOU will be the one who is suffering.  Guys really do let it go, and move on.  My husband taught me that, and it is a lesson that has been invaluable in moving forward.————————————————-So CREATE a GREAT relationship.  Just practice these simple tips in your relationship and you will see WONDERFUL results.  Just get in the habit of saying and dong what is right, in these two instances, and you may be headed towards peace and good communication…. and communication is everything in a relationship!  Have a beautiful day.

BTW, if my posts are not “beautiful” it’s because after over 500 posts, I am still an internet “visual” baby!  I just hope the words are beautiful for you!  Now get to it.  Smile and go hug somebody (well, somebody you won’t get in trouble for hugging!)

 

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

4 Responses to “A Couple of Relationship Tips for Men and Women”

  1. vhhp Says:

    Dear Marsha,
    Thank you very much for the photo! WoW! After these 500 posts of yours only, we could see him, that too, with you.
    Very very happy.
    Coming to your words to both girls and gays, I sincerely feel that those are from your bottom of the heart and I feel that they should catch the attention of each and every young person so that they can see the heart of the experienced.
    I request you to open an account in some other social media too and place these words. If you permit me, I will keep the entire text on my face book wall.
    Thank you for expressing your valuable thoughts
    regards
    prasad

    • Marsha J. O'Brien Says:

      You are welcome. We are so blessed and yes, still in love. Thank you for the kind comments on the post too. I would be honored for you to share my words on your face book wall. I do always write from the heart and I feel glad you can feel that too! Have a beautiful day!

  2. marlajayne Says:

    Great advice. I remember one of Ann Landers’ columns (or Dear Abby’s–not sure which) many, many years ago that gave the fifteen words that each gender wants to hear, and although it was pretty funny and overgeneralized, there’s still a bit of truth in it.
    For men: You’re so smart. You’re so sexy. Dinner is ready. Here’s the remote. I hate shopping.
    For women: I love you. I was wrong. Can I help? Let’s eat out. You look great!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: