Relax, it's just Life!

This is my six-hundred and twenty-third post.  You may think it a bit bizarre, but once in a while, I may be a bit bizarre!

Here I am again, armed withwords, ready to spew forth on paper, from the depth of my dreams the last couple of nights, what needs for me to be released.

Dreams have been a vast portion of my life. For eons dreams have been considered prophecy, or the brain settling in on incidents in a persons life. They have even been considered nonsensical, to have no meaning at all.

They mean something to me. In my life I had two two specific queries I put in my prayers. I needed immediate help with answers, and awoke at four in the morning with my answers. I immediately wrote the dreams on paper, and forthwith followed those answers to perfection.

My dreams have ALWAYS been my “other” life, taking me to places I have never seen and introducing me to peoples I have never met. Ninety-nine percent of the time I have loved my dreams and often wished I could stay in them. On occasion I have closed my eyes and once again returned to the places of my dreams.

I rarely forget my dreams, and only once in a while are they confusing. The best part of my dreams, ever, is flying. There is something in my living soul that makes me feel if I could just remember how – I could fly. I remember lifting off the ground and the positions I was in, and even the places I have flown in my dreams.

Well the past two nights were not so light. If you think I am insane, I am to a certain extent, I think we all have a “touch” of insanity. A human factor that sometimes can be unsettling.

I have no evil in me. Of that I am certain. Just still a “believer” in human kind,  and sometimes that has caused me to make terrible choices. Also, I admit, I have justified certain events in my life so I could “allow” myself to do whatever it was I justified. Big mistake. Alcohol was always involved in my worst mistakes (my husband calls alcohol “devil juice).

This first dream fogs in on a man I once knew who was evil. He was the epitome of evil.

He could make you believe there was good in him, and after a while, would draw you into his scheme of things. He hurt everyone that was in his life.

I bought into his program and wound up marrying him. We were married two years before I realized he was an alcoholic that sat in bars all day while I worked. He was a cheat, and a liar.

I could write a book about the five years I tossed into the trash can, but I survived and learned that which I need never have learned! This man died ten years ago, and it has been over thirty years since I was with him. He killed himself with alcohol and drugs, as he was facing prison for abusing and stealing from the elderly.

Still, he has never left me alone. When he died he was the first person I felt no regret for his death. I only felt relief because he would never hurt anyone again. But in my dreams he has surfaced time and time again.

Each time he was up to his old tricks.   After the dreams I always awoke with the feeling that I wished he would leave me alone! I wondered how long this would go on.

Well night before last it ended. Somehow in this fog we were near a lake – there were inlets and small boats traversing hidden coves. I was not privy to how I killed him, but in my dream he was reduced to a small packet (about the size of a baseball card), and he was dead. I tried to get rid of the card by throwing it in the water, but it floated.

So I took it up and wandered around trying to finish him for good.

There was a campfire close by, not really the kind in a pit, but in a deep barrel. It was burning hotly. I threw the packet in the white-hot fire and he was gone, burnt to ashes.

I knew he would never be back and I felt safe.

Upon waking I was startled, not because I remembered my dreams, but because I knew he would never bother them again. It was finished.

Last night in my dreams I was on crutches, ambling on foot through an unfamiliar town.

I limped past bars, and heard loud voices trying to “out volume” each other. I made it through stores that were closed, and began to walk on the sidewalk. It was going uphill, and I tired, so I went into a store that carried just about everything.

It was busy, but very interesting. I got to the back of the store and saw a green velvet chair that looked very comfortable. I sat down and noticed a pile of large photo albums stacked next to me. I randomly picked one up, and when I looked at the first photo I realized it was pertaining to me, and all that has been in my life, to this point. I turned each page and was fascinated to see all those who have crossed my path, and those who have been in my life for a long while.

About half was through I began to see photographs that were less than photos you would put in your album. Large photographs that reflected things in my life that was prior to this between only me, God, and maybe one or two other human beings. Certainly photographs that I don’t remember, but they were all inclusive as to reflect the times in my life I would rather keep to myself. It was humbling and also a revelation to see experiences and reflections of “another me”.

Somehow, when I awoke, I felt that it was all revealed, and that I am now never to be bothered by the man who haunted my dreams, and that I would never again lean towards a diminishing of my Spirit, nor waste a moment of this precious life. It has been a cleansing two nights, and now that I have written it on paper, things that I will not have to see or review again…for now.

If you dream you will understand. If you don’t, I hope at least I have been able to air my dreams and share with you two nights that I believe are very important in my life.

As I said earlier in the post, sometimes my dreams are so very wonderful I never want to wake up! I call my dreams, “My other life”. I will fly again. So now do you think I am mad?

Have a beautiful day and do not toss to the wind a moment of your life. The moments of your life do the “flying” and I want them to be filled with joy and unrelenting good! You don’t have to be a saint, but be kind, be wise, love mightily, and forgive those who have made mistakes and are trying to go on the right path. That does not mean you have to “hang out” with them, but if you do not forgive, it only hurts you! Be kind to you.

Thanks reading my post! I will write again soon, and one never knows, it may again touch on dreams or who knows what!

Tags: bizarre, death, dreams, human race, men, misery, night, nightmares, people, personal, random, senior citizens, sleeping, story, wakefulness, women, working class people

This entry was posted on May 7, 2014 at 10:29 pm and is filed under Dreams, family, fantasy, friends, LIFE, personal, prayer, sleep, thoughts, women, words, writing. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.