Archive for the ‘Dreams’ Category

DREAMS, DREAMS, DREAMS

July 25, 2017

Some are amazing and some are not.  Read no further if the latter concerns you.

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I think I would wake less tired if I didn’t have a second life in dreams. Last night was a bad night. My brain, I think, is on “overload” – how many challenges in the day time can one handle, let alone all the wee hours of the night.

Studies reveal dreams are only brief moments before we wake, but I beg to differ with that theory. Step into my head and you will find a lifetime in the shadows of the silent hours of that time which is supposed to regenerate mind and body.

I am exhausted this morning for many reasons. Residual effects of the broken back can sometimes leave me in physical disarray, particularly in the morning after a special day of pain and trials. Some mornings I open my eyes, only to close them, because I know movement will be such a challenge.

This morning I spent the night clearly in the repetitive hell of memory brewing a fresh horror, more like “the continuing story of the nightmares of my life”. I know because I remember everything distinctly. Sometimes for days, sometime for years. I can close my eyes and re-enter the dream exactly where I first transferred from sleep to opening my eyes.

I was in a hotel room. A large hotel that I could peek out the door and look \a long way down the line of rooms…but it wasn’t just a hallway. It was a small street with no vehicles and cobblestone. I was not afraid. It was decent, nice even. Though I remember looking out the window near the bed, and there was an alley or small street, dimly lit. I closed the curtain quickly because wisdom told me it was a better choice than peering into that particular area.

My clothes were hanging neatly in the closet across from the sink. It was next to a locked door that led to the next room. I checked to make sure it was locked.

I write about my dreams for the same reason I always write. I write because I love to do so. I want to share wisdom gained by working through the mucky times, and climbing up the ladder to see clearly all around. It feels like she is prodding me to share some of the help I feel still holds me up from the bottomless lake we all paddle around in for so much of our lives.

I write about the dreams like last night simply to release them from my mind, else wise they would keep activating in my consciousness. I aim to keep them powerless over the present and real strength.

Evil sometimes dies, but the stench of spiritless creatures, particularly if they ended in trauma,
can affect our minds….if we allow them too. For evil is present and gaining strength for the moment……

Rape and abuse are so invasive. They are injuries that are the most difficult to heal, and some of the most heartless attacks on the innocent. So was it for me in that alternate world last night.

None of us are pure. With one exception. However most of us at present do not have evil residing in a permanent place within us. Try as they may, the legion, we have the power to overcome and rise above – ANYTHING.

I was accosted again in this dream. Twisted, and worked like warm clay ready to mold. From the inside of my head the confronter was as clear as this moment and wore a suit of silk and mohair. He seduced me with his presence, for he came in cognate and wore “calm and true”, to once again fool and apprehend me. I knew this evil spirit before but was told years ago he had ended when he committed suicide.

By the time I recognized evil it was almost too late. Much of the dream need not be revealed. There is an abundance of horror presented to us every day as “news”. Use your mind to create offensive and abrupt deliverance of evil, if you so choose, or give it only a flip of a thought and move forward with me in this dream I hope I won’t visit again.

A change of time and I found myself loading the gun I carried with me. Sitting outside under a small tree was the creature void of any good spirit – Evil once again sat with someone else (he had already molested a child, and an elderly couple). There are many methods of molestation and all are evil. He was still wearing the suit of silk and mohair.

The most insidious crime of evil is involving a child.

I took out the gun, loaded and cocked it and aimed my shot. I still hear it whirring through the air. I thought it was targeted as a direct hit, a hit to kill, but apparently I was off just a hair as when the ambulance came I saw his head lift slightly and his eyes open for a moment as they carried him off. Another “someone” he fooled, was walking next to him. He was adoring him, fully engulfed in his deceit.

The next moment I found myself tearing clothes off the hangers and throwing things into a suitcase. I knew I would be blamed and with only a few understanding, would be taken off to be imprisoned.

My sister appeared and she knew. As I stopped for a moment I took a breath and closed my eyes. When I opened them I was laying in bed stiff from the pain, from the tips of my toes to the bottom of my head. I closed my eyes and returned….I opened my eyes and jolted up…..trying to breathe and relax those permanently injured parts of this human body. I walked to the kitchen. Stopped to say hello to the dog, got a cup of coffee, and here I sit, finishing the record of my dream life when asleep.

I am better now. Releasing is urgent so as not to have a buildup of evil residing from within.
I am fortunate to have faith in the power given to me by the Holy Spirit. It is real and as I activate the power through breathing in new life, I deactivate evil by now placing it far away and behind me.

Onward and upward I go.

A simple dream

May 24, 2017

Another dream, another night. The first dream was simple and clear. Cooking breakfast, kissing my loved ones good by for the day – knowing we all go our separate way.

In my second dream I was not able to put my foot on the brake while my car was in drive. Forward it went as I struggled to reach the brake. I hadn’t been moving so the thud was small and the jeep was barely hit – but enough to move the other sitting.

“I am not simpatico with the car I drive right now,” I thought…it was a worry. All the bells and whistles. Safety factors I love, but all I want to do is turn the music up loud and drive as fast as I can on a straightaway. Thelma and Louise came to mind.

Before I got in I had tied 3 sets of keys into a large red scarf. A strong gust of wind picked it up, lifting it out of my palm I watched while it became a red kite, flying now almost too high to see. It flew until out of sight and I assumed dropped a few blocks away.

As I stood there I realized, there was nothing I could do! I sat down and thought, “I need to go get busy. I will divert my own attention from this problem and perhaps it will resolve on its own. I will trust God.”

It was a strange dream, as if I were awake and really thinking these things.
The dream was over. I opened my eyes.

Why would I bother to write this down? I have no clue.

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Here it is ten days later than when that dream manifested to paper. I re-read it and one paragraph hit me right between the eyes! I awoke this morning facing a problem that is a conundrum (a confusing and difficult problem to resolve.). I was just mulling over in my brain ANY possible resolve to the problem..thus far, I find none!

Then by chance I saw this in a folder with some writing I am doing, and found my answer! Here is the paragraph:

As I stood there I realized, there was nothing I could do! I sat down and thought, “I need to go get busy. I will divert my own attention from this problem and perhaps it will resolve on its own. I will trust God.”

Conundrum resolved for the time. Got to get up and get busy! CREATE a wonderful day full of moments to cherish!

DREAM

May 22, 2017

Since I broke my back there have been many residual effects physically that I deal with on a basis between me and God. So many emotions and set backs, so much to deal with physically and mentally. Yet I know many living souls must endure hardships.

The dream last night was the most predominant over me physically that I have ever had. It was terrifying. It almost kept me prisoner. I normally awake at 8AM, but on occasion 7 or 7:30. I couldn’t see the clock that has quietly ticked by my bed since mama gave it to me over twenty years ago.

I closed my eyes peacefully, exhausted. I began remembering the horror that beset my life so many years earlier.

I was in the midst of the most time of unrest, confusion and pleasure concocted together in a cocktail of alcohol, remorse, sadness and joys of the the highest in nature…shaken with physical pain and turmoil.

The dream manifested in a home near a large prison. The home itself was a giant maze of rooms and windows and people. I was traveling with someone who gave me love and caused me grief simultaneously. Mixed with memories of past and what seemed the present, we spent time with people who seemed nice but had motives beyond the purity of my mind. It seemed as if the entire place was a nest of normal looking people who were scarred or playing games of sex and violence.

My traveling companion and I parted often while in this house, as the hostess was showing me the projection of the continuous building of the house. He disappeared and appeared frequently enough not to be unsettling.

She showed me the biggest room being built, and it faced a prison, both with men and women.
You could see them though an iron fence clearly – walking and being lead here and there. Suddenly officers burst into the room and told the woman she would need to close up all windows facing the prison. The next few minutes were confusing and filled with the bustle of officers and strange faces confronting one another.

I knew it was time to go. I didn’t want to be there anyway. I thought someone I had believed to be in the prison was with my animals, and I needed to find out for sure. That was the purpose of the trip. It was then the companion appeared. He had been having sex with many of the women. I swallowed hard but wasn’t hurt. I just wanted to leave.

I knew this had happened and I told my companion “We need to leave. He hemmed and said it was made excuses to keep stopping on the trek. We made our way through the rooms and I politely said goodbye, I am leaving. He chose to come but stopped along the way and was engaged in sex with both genders now. If was a sickness. There were excuses made. His spirit had left him exiting through indulgences.. There was no excuse to me.

Ready to go, sitting in a blue vehicle that was open, long, and with only two seats. It was more like sitting in a futurist ride at a fairground, but it was sitting next to others similar, in nature. No wheels, no steering. He said he needed to do something before we left. I sat.

Then I got up and looked and he was sexually interacting with several men. I had to leave, only to find myself wondering from place to place in what seemed like a number of stores with cobblestone walk ways. I saw a mix of others…some of his kind – those he had known, and many who were in my position. I was exhausted and sat down to get off my feet. They had begun to be numb again, tingling and painful.

I heard music, rather a loud rhythm to music, like a drum in the distance getting louder. All I wanted to do was get out of there. Before I could leave someone brought my traveling companion and said he had caring for him. He had been in a fight and my fraudulent friend was in a state of permanent brain damage, and would be there laying down forever. He was still with eyes closed. It was better. I told him I could not take him and I could not stay. The man nodded.

The next thing I remember clearly was thinking I needed to move and get out of there. I opened my eyes and tried to move. I was in bed laying on my side and my feet wouldn’t move….its happened before for a moment upon waking, but this time it seemed my arms, (one by my side, and one overhead) wouldn’t move. I tried to keep my eyes open, but they began to close and I was in the dream again, with the drumming loud now. I closed my eyes and felt absolute fear.

I tried again to open my eyes, or to move, and though they opened and I was cognizant of wanting to move, they closed again and I couldn’t. I was frozen in that position, literally frozen, but my mind knew I had to move. I thought of calling the dog to awaken me, but words wouldn’t come out of my mouth. I was terrified now. My eyes closed again and I knew I was returning to this place – but I knew I must not do so. I did briefly, then startled myself trying to awake.

I turned to God now as I always do and asked for help. As He always does, in one way or another, He made me know I was going to move. He never leaves me but asks only that I call upon Him for help.

I moved my my arm above my head and wiggled my fingers. I worked my eyes until they stayed open, and began to force my back to turn and my legs to move. It was terrified to be frozen in real time. Terrified. It was not a dream now….I had passed from a state of unconscious life not under my control…. I was coming back. I moved my arm now that was at my side, and used it to help turn me to my back. I felt the sting of pain, and a push behind me.
When I first moved, I felt I wanted to return to the place I had just been…I had not gotten the task of finding my dog and my friend completed. That wasn’t it. I somehow wanted, in part, to return. But I was horrified at the thought of laying there unable to moved and with my mind and body fully in another place – one that was filled with fear and one that took the purity of my mind and held it captive.

My eyes wanted to close, but only God could keep them open. The thought of Him empowered my movements and I turned to my other side, forcing my legs and feet to move with me.

I took a breath and abruptly sat and then with feet still not under my control I stood and moved quickly to keep my presence. I ambled down the hallway, saw the dog laying in the kitchen, and he lifted his head and looked at me. Somehow he senses when I am in peril and I was still terrified. I moved from room to room awakening those frozen limbs, my eyes now fully opened.

I was beyond that place and wandering from room to room, until fully separated. I knew I had to write this dream, as I do many dreams, and begin to live in this world again. This struggle with my body movement and breaking loose was not a dream. I feel I am to reiterate – “Time is of the essence. Move, be alive and choose wisely.”

Minutes passed and I asked the dog to sit on the bed next to me, which he eagerly did, as I reached for this laptop to record the nights events and the exit from one real world to the other.

My exit is complete now and I feel exonerated from the night. I was not deluded with alcohol or other drugs when I said good night to my husband and switched off the light.

I am fully awake now. I don’t want to go to that place again. It has nothing for me. I stopped writing for a moment, stretched my neck and turned and looked at the clock. One hour has passed since the trauma of awakening and movement began. It feels good to be able to stretch and move. I am scarred but alive – I never want to be taken away like that wherein I am “almost” unable to return.
I remember my dreams, sometimes for years, though I have never been trapped like that in one before. I do not want to experience that again. I know my dreams will continue. I know this dream has meaning for those who understand.

Before I could post this, my dog jumped off the bed in panic. I rushed to the backslider and opened it and he proceeded to throw up from the beginning of the patio to the edge of the grass.
Far-fetched I know, but looking at the mess to clean up. I thought he took the remnants of the horrible feelings I had on this bed, in escaping this dream, and he vomited them up .

He feels better now, and so do I.

I have thanked God for the power He bestows upon anyone, no matter what his or her history, for just believing. I have asked and pleaded all my life for things. It would be so remiss of me not to remember to praise and thank God for His power in my life.

I want to dream of flying again. For this awakening I press towards what remains of my living days on this planet earth as a human being. I am grateful.

Dream

September 19, 2016

I recently saw a movie entitled “Equals” – my husband slept through most of it, though it rang several familiar bells in my head.  It was okay, but just gently interesting and and basically a love story.  It reminded me of a book I had read years and years ago – “1984 (better remembered as “Big Brother).

I actually followed up on that thought and found the director or producer of this filmed had pretty much followed the books theme.  As many current movies do, an older book or movie is picked clean and presented to the multitudes as a “new and spectacular” themed movie.

The Bible says:  “There is nothing new under the sun….” What it means is that anything we experience now has already been experienced and to believe that you have a fresh new idea, way of thinking, activity or anything than you are mistaken. Everything that can be thought of already has – only much of it is lost in history. It is not referring to reincarnation – however, that is another discussion altogether.

So I post today something I dreamed sometime in 2013.  I was recovering from two major spinal surgeries, so my dreams and my writing exploded.  I couldn’t do much else at that point.  But most of the things I wrote were just filed in a “writing” folder – with the intention of completing them at some point.

My mind was imploding we thoughts and feelings, and in that situation, if I had not written them down I might have blown at any moment!  As I shuffled through the file this morning I found this dream that I  experienced.

I say “experienced” because if you have read any of my prior dreams posted you would know my dreams are my “other life”.  A life I remember, and actually often can close my eyes and begin again at the same place!

So here it is :

DEVIL JUICE

The devils come out to play at night,

You must usher them gone in the light.

Inescapable, something written in the stars,

Not from Neptune – or Jupiter, – or mars.

Thwart their moves and push their plots away.

In Jesus name you have control

Today and every day.

You know who the devils are.

 

It never occurred to me that I would one day push a little girl off a ragged cliff and send her tumbling down into a rapidly flowing river. I had to do it. She was going invaded and consumed by satan.

It all began after the irreversible vaporization of much of the common population. No one knew if they were next. The thought police had begun the task years before, but the commons were transfixed with self and possessions. They hadn’t a clue they were already doomed. It began in mid century of the twenty third century. The Watchers knew as they listened past the inconsequential affair the commons seemed to have with the Leaders. Some thought it was impossible not to be caught up in the faces and folly they professed to the Commons. Watchers knew differently.

Dwellings still had the appearance of when they were all free, but we knew. We knew we were being scouted and appraised every moment of the day. We knew we could be plucked from our lives as easily as one plucked a petal off of a flower – in the day – when flowers were fragrant and followed the natural way to death and rebirth.

My days had been filled with Addison. Thoughts of rolling over and over with him in the sand, hot on our bare bodies, took over any sense that remained in my intellect.

If I wasn’t in the midst of remembering torrent love making, I was planning on our next encounter with thought, and thinking of our last.

When the three women moved into the stack below us, a chill ran across my back.

It wasn’t their appearances or demeanor, but something from within my gut told me these women were more than trouble; they were possessed.

Demons found it easy to disguise and enter a pure soul. There were still many hiding. People had been deceived for so long, the Quiet People found it necessary to begin to hide in more unusual ways. All a demon- plagued humans needed to do was offer a drink of devil juice, and gently nestle into the pure spirit from within each person. Once the spirit was diminished it was easy to guide these persons into a corrupt morality and vision. Once activated in a person, it was then his or her thought could find a no way to recover from the loss. Of course evil was still in control of most of the people of the planet and even those untouched were forced to go into hiding – at least their true knowledge.

It took re-education to train the untouchable ones. Thought police were everywhere and also were easily disguised. Untouchable ones were forced to stay in the hollows most hours of the day. The longer they remained in the Light from the Light, the stronger they became and the more resistant to tamper and experiment with “the juice”

There were ways to connect, but always with caution. Addison and I had known each other before the day of vaporization. We had a small circle of friends who were able to manifest the hollow mode and enter the hollows until they were certain those new were cleared.

No one Quiet people drank any form of devil juice. Thought police were aware of this and so it was urgent that they maintain neutral and hollow positions now, for most of the time. Night was of specific danger as the pathway to destruction widened and anyone who wanted to drink was able to get it for free. Laws regarding age limits, and any limits on the juice that had been active for years, were disregarded as soon as the earth turned to the point of darkness.

For that time it was best for all untouchable ones to lock themselves in their stack and simply withdraw until dawn. It was as easy as that, and as difficult. The temptation was always there as the noise of the night was not monitored or curbed in any way. The only way to close out the outer world was to play loud music – which of course -all untouchable ones did.

Addison and I did not live together. He had been discovered dead five years earlier, however, the death was planned and though I was not aware of it, he actually survived in the hollows without contacting me until a few months ago.

I opened my eyes sitting up.

 

 

 

DREAM of the Kilo Year

June 2, 2016

This dream two nights ago took me to a new level of dream reality. My dreams have nothing to do with my faith as that is like a rock – but sometimes they seem to allow me to have another reality. A reality now where there is no disability. There is so much as an finite human I have still to learn; so many talents that none of us bring to light because we do not know, or do not believe strongly enough to manifest the being of these gifts.

All my life, since a few nightmares when I was a child, I have had AMAZING dreams.My father did too. They are (some people have asked me) in color, and it has been easy to sometimes awake and then go back to sleep and pick up where I left off.

My dreams have been answers two prayers, at least twice that I remember specifically. I love my dreams.

I wasn’t in a good place in this dream. Very rarely have I personally ever been afraid in a dream, and through I cannot remember what the dream was (that is rare too as sometimes my dreams stay with me for days or indefinitely) – I was frightened.

Since my puppy was big enough to jump on the bed, each morning I awake with him lying next to me. I open my eyes and he is sound asleep next to me, or I awake to his eyes looking directly into mine.

Back to the dream. That morning I did open my eyes – I wanted to leave the dream I think – but apparently, not really!  I put my arm around the sleeping dog and closed my eyes and went immediately back to sleep.

The dream began again, but this time I wasn’t frightened – my puppy was right next to me and I had my arm around him. I was no longer afraid. He was absolutely with me.

What is so unusual about this dream is it is the first one that I have come back to this reality, and taken “someone” with me into my dream. Though I have no memory of what the dream was at all, I remember I was no longer frightened. I could feel his chest rise and fall with each breath – and he was awake and checking the perimeter around us.

I woke up and my arm was still around him, but this time he was alert, and checking the perimeter around us. It still amazes me because he came into the dream upon my need and request.  He has begun to stay with me every step I take…almost as if remembers……

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Dream

March 4, 2016

“My life is like a continually changing convergence of forms, a kaleidoscope of ever moving- breathing- me.   On the outside I have softened to a sweet and tender place.  Yet inside I am like the hard seed in a cherry or a plumb, unable and unwilling to succumb to being eaten by this world. God placed the seed and it is in my heart until my last breath. I choose to acknowledge it and with intellect allowed my feet to be directed to my futures.”

I will never give up and never give in.  I will continue to repeat the mantra reiterated in the first paragraph. I am not empowered by the spirit of this world.

Abruptly as we finished unloading the boxes, there was a knock at the door. The man told us we needed to put on shoes, grab a bag, and head to a meeting place several blocks away. The neighbor’s homes were scattered on this big piece of land, but close enough to wave and yell hello. My new neighbor yelled, “Come on we need to get there quickly.

Try as I may I couldn’t find shoes and finally gave up, borrowing my sisters slippers. The family drove in two cars, my husband and son and myself, and my sister and her eldest son.

When we arrived at the “center” we were told to sit quietly and then moved to another area where we were allowed to choose a seat in a small group.   My husband sat next to me . Though because of my recent operation and the back injuries that I sustained several years ago I could not find something adequate.

A man, of Asian descent came up behind us and told me to settle down and handed us a cookie and a glass of something to drink.

All the while I felt that while were viewing what had been told was a “movie” for the neighbors, our homes were being ransacked neatly and carefully. Somehow I envisioned every corner and hiding place were being painstakingly gone through and replaced carefully to look as if no one had been there at all. The dogs knew, but I knew they would know to watch for their safety as well, and might think it good to remain out of sight.

After scoping in all the small groups around me, there were about five of them, I noticed there were peoples of all ages, health, and race – with the exception of Asian. I saw anyone that was Asian was working, male or female.

Within a brief time my husband was becoming irritated for my comfort, and was slapped several times and told to sit down. Fear began enveloping everyone in the room and we knew it had begun.

One by one individuals were selected and placed in a special chair – gone over and told what was really each person’s ailment or need. Someone was dispatched to replace the brace on my lower left side – to the opposite side. It didn’t matter how I protested, it was done.

My husband, nephew and sister were taken out of view. After reviving the injury to a selected correction, I was placed in the chair. I was angry and fearful and told them to stop. I felt pressure on the top of my chair and I was dropped out of view of the others

I found myself sitting in a chair opposite to an Asian woman – I have no enemies – no bigotry within me, but distinctly the woman was tiny (as were the men- short, that is to say), and with a distinct look in the face and eyes. The woman was stern and had scissors in her hand.

I said, “DO NOT CUT MY HAIR.” It is my hair. She told me, “Oh I won’t.”

The next thing I remember is feeling the back of my hair and instead of waist length, it was cropped short and had almost a roosters top piece. I was so angry. But my anger was ignored. I wanted to reach out and grab her and tear her apart – I was so angry with all of it. I couldn’t.

I silently cursed her. With my lips closed I did something I have not done for eons of time and cursed her over and over again..I knew there was an evil power in the curses.  I looked for my husband and he came to me – much shorter and almost placid in appearance. My nephew appeared too, and he was silenced and subdued. We were told we could leave.

I asked my husband if he was all right and he said that the Marine training had been more severe, just different. My nephew did not speak.  I could not find my sister.

We got up and walked towards the door. The rooms were still full and yet it was quiet.

Outside cars and trucks were parking and leaving, always directed by someone Asian.

The last thing I remember is waking up in my bed and sitting up abruptly. The happiness was gone and a hard stern look was upon my face. I was absolutely traumatized and felt an angry demeanor within my personal realm.

I found myself walking towards the kitchen, and the tears began to flow. It was over for now. For now.

 

 

Dreams: Mental Images during sleep? Another reality?

April 11, 2015

The place was unknown to me, but there was a familiarity about it.  Tiny tight streets filled with tightly woven businesses. No vehicles, not even a bicycle. Open doors that led to well-lit rooms that seemed so small. It was difficult to tell the time as the sky seemed somewhere between dusk and darkness. The small streets moved upward with an incline that made it almost a chore to move that way.  I knew there was a river down below.

I climbed the circular stairs to a small wooden building and walked boldly into the empty space. It was apparent someone lived there, but the quiet was all around me. Steaming pots rolled their substances in boiling bubbles, while lightweight curtains moved slightly pushing out the open window.

There was a bed in the corner and a small fireplace that sat neatly in the middle of the floor within a container that protected it from lashing out. Coal burnt hotly and I looked below to see the last rays of the sun before the earth turned to the dark side.

It was a strange little place, compact and cozy; within the place your could grasp everything one would need to survive comfortably. I noticed the feeling of a familiar, but unknown presence. It left a spirit of calmness about me.

Ii walked to the open space to pass through to another room. No door, just an area big enough to move from one place to another. Before I did so, I saw a shining instrument sitting in the corner to the left of the door.

It was like a harp, a magnificent instrument that I might have dreamed of playing in another time. I withheld my desire to touch it with thoughts that automatically were respectful of its owner.

As I walked across the threshold to another place the inside became a brilliant mix of protective covering and yet the ceiling was open sky and now the stars sparkled with a blinding brilliance, yet softened by, to my knowledge, space untouched by living creatures.

I saw three handsome me. One spoke to me. He was from the neutered gender, and was warm and charming. He wasn’t sad.  He was muscular and I could tell right away,  kind and true.

The two other men were gentle souls. It didn’t matter, as we were all fixated on something more beautiful than I had ever seen. So simple yet there was elegance

I was spellbound for the moment.

Without warning I found myself leaning forward and bursting into flight and became a presence above the entire setting. It was something I had dreamed of doing before these past years, something I had done, but that was years ago, and when I really could remember how to do it. Then it was necessary to think about lifting and then bending forward slightly as I increased my speed to be able to relax and glide easily – even between buildings tightly woven together. I reached heights and watched, then swooped to glide over where ever I chose to fly.

This time I simply lifted without thought and angled slightly to direct my path above the partially closed building. It was as I had remembered but much less the task of preparation. I just enjoyed the feeling and watched the activity below me. I caught the handsome man peering at me and smiling. I smiled back.

I turned my body and felt as if I was floating on my back in water. A shooting star crossed the path of my eyes and I smiled again.

Again without warning, I felt something touch my hand and then gently lick it.

I opened my eyes and it was the puppy sitting next to the bed. His big eyes told me he needed to go out so I got up, this time on my feet, and took him out. Everything was quiet except the singing of birds and the rustling of leaves in the trees.

The sun was not yet in full view.

I wonder if this will be one of those dreams that will pick up where it left off, or one that simply is speaking to me in bits and pieces. There was no color in this dream, but it wasn’t necessary. It was lovely, and it seemed to be preeminent.

A strange day takes a Holy turn!

March 16, 2015

I had absolutely NO intention of writing this. NONE at all. I lay down because of the weakness of my back, and I needed to put heat on my back because the pain is overwhelming. I was feeling terrible and thought about the meaning of hope. With all sincerity, I put the laptop on my lap, and the words below just came tumbling out of my head. No forethought, no thought at all of what to write in this post….except to write what is posted below: Verbatim.  I haven’t even re-read what I wrote – 100% honestly!  I will later….
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No wonder we cannot understand why God allows terrible things to happen. It’s all a dream. From a perspective that assumes I have an inkling of really KNOWING all about God, I think I get it.

We are God’s creations, but in order for God to understand the human being, mind, body and soul, He sent His son to see if we are worth all the trouble. Jesus knows a great many of us are, and just needed a teacher to show the Way.

Jesus knows. He understands everything is REAL to us. He knows that pain and torture are real to us. He knows that the suffering of man is almost unbearable – enough to ask God Himself NOT to follow through with the plan. He was also afraid and did not want to face the torture man can inflict upon another. He saw the pain the death of others caused those who truly loved each other.  He saw the questioning of God’s existence when a child was lost…

He had an edge. He could have used his power, as the ONLY begotten Son of God, to perform a miracle and not sacrifice Himself. But He also understood the power of CHOICE that man has within himself.

He chose to take on “the world” and all the “sins of man” to become the ultimate mentor and advocate for God Himself. He died so that when our earthly death comes to take us, we are not lost forever into oblivion. He chose to be our Shepherd and guide. He was and is, the Way, the Truth and the Life.

He took upon Himself, within His mind and body, ALL of our mistakes, and the evil behavior of many of us. He carried the burden to His death….and Resurrection.
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Here is an absolute post script. I didn’t remember this even until I had written the post, and then the preface. It just came to me. One of those epiphany moments. I had gotten out of bed this morning (and I confess – I have been on a spiritual low for a while) – and I got on bended knees next to the bed. That’s no easy trick for me since my back surgeries. I simply asked that the Holy Spirit be activated and fill me.

I feel at peace right now, and I am breathing easier. Sweet!  I also just read the post, and it is exactly what I do believe but more in terms the common man (myself included) can comprehend.  Sometimes the Bible is a tad difficult and confusing.

A strange day!

March 16, 2015

I could have given up as my keyboard has been turning off and it is kind of distracting – HOWEVER, this has been such a strange day thus far, I need to share it.  There will be two posts today.

The first one was my dream last night:

I saw the large pool and it was so clear I could see how deep it was. No one was swimming in the pool, no one near except a man and a woman who stood near the side of the pool in the shallow area. They spoke softly. As I walked the far edge of the pool I could hear his voice, now gruff and much louder. I could also hear the shrill and obvious displeasure in her voice. Both were talking at the same time.

I walked to the concert area and the group of women who had been practicing for weeks were arguing with four members of another group. I understood after all the practice they dedicated, they wanted to present their interpretation of the play.

I also knew the members of the other group, far more experienced and professional, and they were simply trying to offer suggestions to refine and excite the performances. Everyone was chattering loudly and defensively at the same time.

No one understood the others motives, really, they were just trying to hold on to what was so important it wound up in an arguement.

As I left the hall one frail girl asked a man of questionable character, if he could score any drugs. I walked by them quietly.

I entered the door to the left and saw the group that had been in the concert hall. Don’t know how they had gotten there without passing me in the hallway. The experienced and really good group were discouraged. They were talking about how they had spent years on the road working hard and still were left with a pittance and no place to go at the moment.

Somehow I knew the person who usually occupied the opulent and airy room. The bedroom had been neat, but once I spoke to the owner, and asked him if they could stay the night, and they knew it was okay, they began to drop their bags and instruments and sit or relax, one by one on a bed or chair.

The once attractive woman, now worn and exhausted, began to sing softly. Her sweet voice sent chills through my body as I recognized the words, “how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me…”

The words faded into silence as she wearily closed her eyes and her constantly wringing hands and body relaxed into a deep sleep. She was oblivious to the world around her. I could see her as a beautiful young woman. She still was beautiful in an ethereal way.

I knew they needed money and I opened my bag to find lots of money. There were rolled bills, a stack of flat bills – topped with a hundred dollar bill. There were several rolls of money and a heavy bag of change. I peeked in it and there were only quarters and half dollars. I had no idea where the money came from but felt pressed to count it.

I looked around and everyone else was either resting on a bed (or sitting)  with a laptop near by, or one form or another of the almighty iphone. Each donned tiny earphones placed carefully at the lobe of their own ears. One man both looked and listened at two different electrical appliances at once, with the seriousness of someone trying to do the impossible “perhaps unboil an egg” I thought.

I remembered going to an enormous “event” earlier. The top of the building looked like the striped and vibrant design of an old time circus. Everyone had prepaid to enter.

I looked around and thought, “I am in the midst of so many things that mean absolutely nothing. Everyone works so hard and pay with the hours of their lives, and then they pay to enter this place and spend all of their money on things that mean NOTHING.”
It seemed preposterous to me.

I came back to the present moment  began to count the cash. The bound stacks of money were different. Some lighter in tones and some quite a bit darker. I thought it might be counterfeit. Then I thought, it’s all counterfeit anyway…bills made of paper that purchase things that mean nothing. I thought of my home. Modest, sturdy, a place to sleep and be tied to day after day. – I paid almost $700.00 in interest alone. Everything seems to be counterfeit. “You pay to live and it’s all meaningless,” I thought.

$5,500 thus far. I knew it all was placed before our eyes (technology, things and money) to snare us into the trap. The almighty we dedicated our lives to brought distance and arguing between peoples. It took without return, except what “appeared” to be a fleeting moment of worth.

I thought all the beauty and things of actual value given to us freely, and how we all seemed to push these things aside for the shiny gold coin. I thought of God and opened my eyes and realized I had been dreaming.

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The second post will be after I grab something to eat.  I felt my stomach hurt.  God bless all those who find themselves hungry with nothing to eat.

Another world – another dream

November 26, 2014

My dreams have become much more intense. I find it more difficult to escape to a waking state the last couple of months. When I awake I do not want to return to my dreams, but sometimes I open my eyes, see the lights in the kitchen, or hear my husband up and getting ready for work, and I close my eyes knowing I will return to my dream.

I see them clearly for days – with my eyes open. They seem to have a warning within them. I notice more and more the rooms have lots of people but they are under the commands of the heads of the machines that run constantly.

A man walks close to the door and is seductively pulled in to see what is happening. Then it becomes nearly impossible to escape, though a few keep trying.

The human is drawn in by the technology and then the human looses the power to choose – or at least is taught that he can no longer choose. He believes it. He must continue to be in a trance and keep the systems running efficiently. He doesn’t know why. The unit of humans is no longer and each is alone.

I tried last night to find an exit, to move out into the fresh air and away from the sway of the ever-powerful machines, and those fully indoctrinated in commanding the humans to continue to work until they die.

I made it outside once and there was a long stretch of beach, and a large tree in front of me. I climbed it and could see for miles, but there was no place to go, only the large building behind me. I knew if I went back in I would not be able to leave again, and I saw “words” coming to retrieve me; to lure me back into the fold.

I wanted my family. I wanted to be with all those I loved. I climbed down from the tree and spoke to the “words” trying to coax me back to the way everyone else had gone. It seemed hopeless and overpowering.

When I awoke again I was relieved as I had been afraid and knew the ending was going to be bad, yet I closed my eyes and went back into my dream to fight what was happening. I was afraid but I knew I had the choice to win.

I was once again in the building – this time I noticed it was huge and seemed to be almost a maze. I could hear voices but everyone was separated. Occasionally I would see a group being guided to another area and then separated. Everyone was so subservant. No struggle, they moved like a herd of cattle heading for the barn to be fed-or to the slaughterhouse….

I slid quietly from one space to another and then I knew I was going to get out again.i would fight with every breath.

I opened my eyes and it was 7AM, the day before Thanksgiving, 2014.