Posts Tagged ‘friends’

I didn’t mean to kill my dog!

April 20, 2017

No one wants to think that they are to blame for an instance where they loose someone they love. But in my heart of hearts I know it was my fault that Dakota’s life was cut short. After breaking my back I was unable to walk with her and do the things with her I once did. She sat next to me, loyally, and I never encouraged her to leave my side.

The last year it seemed her ability to walk had gotten worse, perhaps the injury to her ACL when she was young had gotten worse due to lack of exercise. But there is no excuse. I kept giving her treats and marrow bones and she loved them.

At one point I realized she had put on lots of weight, but was unable to walk her too help her get it off. Even if I cut down on her food, my sweet husband would wind up giving her treats. He was just too exhausted to walk her. So there she sat.

She was happy to be near us. That’s the thing about a dog….they are so loyal and their love is so unconditional. I knew she was gaining weight. I could see it as she meandered to the back yard to take care of her business, and to sniff for cats.

One day she walked only to the edge of the yard and just watched me. She did this for a while. I couldn’t coax her to walk further.

That week my husband and I loaded the dogs into the forerunner and took a ride to the woods. She loved going in the car with the windows partly down. She couldn’t jump down as her hind side was weaker, probably from the weight. But she walked in the woods and went to the water and stepped in as if she had been doing it everyday. She loved water too.

By the time we got to the truck we were all tuckered and both dogs were a little less excited, and more whipped!

She was a big girl. No doubt about it. Her barrel chest was very predominant and though the weight was on, she still looked beefy and beautiful.

A couple of weeks later it snowed. She gingerly stepped out in the yard with the pup, now almost two. They shoveled the snow with their noses and were fascinated by the accumulation on the ground. The cool felt good to her and she was like a young girl dog, but one who found it difficult to run because of the extra pounds. They stayed out and played for a while and then she settled in next to me, covered with a blanket to keep her warm.

When I mentioned I was worried about the weight my husband said it was okay, she could “go happy and have what she wanted.” I didn’t want her to “go”, and I knew I needed to do something. I knew it would eventually hurt her, but I did nothing. I didn’t know what to do. I should have made a plan to help her.

She was still beautiful the day she died in my arms, from what we think was a heart attack. She was only seven. I cried for 10 days and 10 nights, and I will cry for her till my days end. It wasn’t her fault. She was only seven.

I know I am human and we all make mistakes, but this was a mortal one that took my faithful friend away forever. I was the one who knew she was too heavy, and I was the one who did nothing to change it! God knows I didn’t mean to let her die too young. I know I didn’t mean to….and I know I will NEVER let an animal get too much weight on in my lifetime. When you hear “Don’t let your dog get overweight” – listen! It can kill them. I am not just sitting here letting my life be ruined, but this is a lesson I do not want anyone else to experience.

I will honor her life by never letting it happen again. The price you pay is just too high. I see her trusting eyes looking into mine, and I pray she knows I never meant to hurt her. I pray God knows.

If you love your animals, if you love your children, if you love yourself – be careful not to overload with useless food “just to eat”. It’s not worth the death of someone you love, and it can happen.

It happened to me.

pup on back 2

Dakota – 6 weeks

Dakota

Dakota – almost 7 – my best friend

Picking up the pieces

September 25, 2016

 

I opened the refrigerator and saw the crystal bowl, as if in slow motion, drop in waves and then hit the floor with a mighty sound of glass splintering and grapes breaking off into all directions.

People use God’s name is so many situations. Thank God it’s cooled down. Thank God no one was hurt. Thank God the storm was less than expected. I often wonder if the name of God is even recognized any more, and if God has become just a phrase to express relief. I wonder if people really mean THANK GOD.

Thank God no splinters flew into the eyes of my puppy, standing off a far, looking as if he had done something wrong. I wondered if he would run off to the “naughty room”, his dog house, as he does when he carries something in his mouth that doesn’t belong there.

No, thank God he stood still and just watched, along with my good old girl, Dakota. Black as the night, wide eyed as children, they just waited for some reaction from me. To their surprise, I laughed. Why not.

My husband says to open any door or cupboard anywhere in the house is like looking for a bomb to explode. This time he was right. No one got cut. The bowl was just a material object, and the only other loss was a bunch of grapes.

I cleaned everything up. Looked at the precarious position of an opened twelve pack of Ginger Ale, I and decided to leave them where they were on the third shelf. Why not live dangerously….

It was so much easier to laugh and smile than to let the current situation overcome my senses and my life. I knew this too would pass.

Now think of politics. Let it go. It is not going to be life-changing to throw away all the moments and days we spend worrying. Let it go, and as it’s been said many times before….

Let it go and let God! The only control we really have is our response to life. I tried being miserable and it sucked. So I gave it up.

Dream

September 19, 2016

I recently saw a movie entitled “Equals” – my husband slept through most of it, though it rang several familiar bells in my head.  It was okay, but just gently interesting and and basically a love story.  It reminded me of a book I had read years and years ago – “1984 (better remembered as “Big Brother).

I actually followed up on that thought and found the director or producer of this filmed had pretty much followed the books theme.  As many current movies do, an older book or movie is picked clean and presented to the multitudes as a “new and spectacular” themed movie.

The Bible says:  “There is nothing new under the sun….” What it means is that anything we experience now has already been experienced and to believe that you have a fresh new idea, way of thinking, activity or anything than you are mistaken. Everything that can be thought of already has – only much of it is lost in history. It is not referring to reincarnation – however, that is another discussion altogether.

So I post today something I dreamed sometime in 2013.  I was recovering from two major spinal surgeries, so my dreams and my writing exploded.  I couldn’t do much else at that point.  But most of the things I wrote were just filed in a “writing” folder – with the intention of completing them at some point.

My mind was imploding we thoughts and feelings, and in that situation, if I had not written them down I might have blown at any moment!  As I shuffled through the file this morning I found this dream that I  experienced.

I say “experienced” because if you have read any of my prior dreams posted you would know my dreams are my “other life”.  A life I remember, and actually often can close my eyes and begin again at the same place!

So here it is :

DEVIL JUICE

The devils come out to play at night,

You must usher them gone in the light.

Inescapable, something written in the stars,

Not from Neptune – or Jupiter, – or mars.

Thwart their moves and push their plots away.

In Jesus name you have control

Today and every day.

You know who the devils are.

 

It never occurred to me that I would one day push a little girl off a ragged cliff and send her tumbling down into a rapidly flowing river. I had to do it. She was going invaded and consumed by satan.

It all began after the irreversible vaporization of much of the common population. No one knew if they were next. The thought police had begun the task years before, but the commons were transfixed with self and possessions. They hadn’t a clue they were already doomed. It began in mid century of the twenty third century. The Watchers knew as they listened past the inconsequential affair the commons seemed to have with the Leaders. Some thought it was impossible not to be caught up in the faces and folly they professed to the Commons. Watchers knew differently.

Dwellings still had the appearance of when they were all free, but we knew. We knew we were being scouted and appraised every moment of the day. We knew we could be plucked from our lives as easily as one plucked a petal off of a flower – in the day – when flowers were fragrant and followed the natural way to death and rebirth.

My days had been filled with Addison. Thoughts of rolling over and over with him in the sand, hot on our bare bodies, took over any sense that remained in my intellect.

If I wasn’t in the midst of remembering torrent love making, I was planning on our next encounter with thought, and thinking of our last.

When the three women moved into the stack below us, a chill ran across my back.

It wasn’t their appearances or demeanor, but something from within my gut told me these women were more than trouble; they were possessed.

Demons found it easy to disguise and enter a pure soul. There were still many hiding. People had been deceived for so long, the Quiet People found it necessary to begin to hide in more unusual ways. All a demon- plagued humans needed to do was offer a drink of devil juice, and gently nestle into the pure spirit from within each person. Once the spirit was diminished it was easy to guide these persons into a corrupt morality and vision. Once activated in a person, it was then his or her thought could find a no way to recover from the loss. Of course evil was still in control of most of the people of the planet and even those untouched were forced to go into hiding – at least their true knowledge.

It took re-education to train the untouchable ones. Thought police were everywhere and also were easily disguised. Untouchable ones were forced to stay in the hollows most hours of the day. The longer they remained in the Light from the Light, the stronger they became and the more resistant to tamper and experiment with “the juice”

There were ways to connect, but always with caution. Addison and I had known each other before the day of vaporization. We had a small circle of friends who were able to manifest the hollow mode and enter the hollows until they were certain those new were cleared.

No one Quiet people drank any form of devil juice. Thought police were aware of this and so it was urgent that they maintain neutral and hollow positions now, for most of the time. Night was of specific danger as the pathway to destruction widened and anyone who wanted to drink was able to get it for free. Laws regarding age limits, and any limits on the juice that had been active for years, were disregarded as soon as the earth turned to the point of darkness.

For that time it was best for all untouchable ones to lock themselves in their stack and simply withdraw until dawn. It was as easy as that, and as difficult. The temptation was always there as the noise of the night was not monitored or curbed in any way. The only way to close out the outer world was to play loud music – which of course -all untouchable ones did.

Addison and I did not live together. He had been discovered dead five years earlier, however, the death was planned and though I was not aware of it, he actually survived in the hollows without contacting me until a few months ago.

I opened my eyes sitting up.

 

 

 

Here is the Confession

September 6, 2016

Here is the confession. Since my accident and incidents therein,

Too often I fall into deep depression.

 

I know in cyberspace there are fellow humans of like mind,

sometimes we search for answers, but answers do not find.

 

There is nothing shameful about having depression you see,

It happens in this lifetime, next door and across the sea,

It happens to us all -to you, and even me.

 

We are human. We feel love, terror, and pain, trauma.

Depression can hit us all – depression is not drama!

 

I awoke this morning covered with sorrow like dense fog.

Unable to find the departure, chained like a wild dog.

 

“What is the purpose of life?” I thought. My life is changed forever, and not for better.

I had a pity party – a pitiful one – no one came.

 

It was only I, raging like I was waging a war against myself.

Then praying, while rather insane, I placed my mind upon a shelf.

 

At last I thought, I knew what to do. Divert my own attention to something else……and maybe you should too.

 

So I left the room I was working in, took a breath or two and dropped to my knees.

“Give me help dear Lord, I prayed, let my heart feel at peace, if you please.”

 

Here I lay in bed, with laptop resting on my legs.

Writing simple poetry, trying to turn a phrase.

 

If I dwell on my sorrow, and cry and whimper, I will to hell cross the line,

Then I won’t smile or have joy in this moment of time.

 

All we have is this moment to live,

I must turn my thoughts not to get, but to love and to give.

 

I lay here and realize I still can write.

I can see in the daytime, and find rest at night.

 

Within there is a flicker of my light that should shine for many reasons I know.

I will find a few to jostle my memory, and wrestle depression with strength just to show….

 

I can DO whatever I think I can! My sorrows are few compared to many a man.

I do not know how much I time I have left to look at my life – nor days to enjoy.

 

I want to be an example of faith and of love,

I will keep praying for power from that of above.

 

I AM better already, can you read and see? Like I would with a child who needs help,

I diverted my own attention, and the task set me free.

 

Change your thoughts, change your emotions.

Use your wits to climb from the pits.

 

You may think this a silly poem, and some might think it not a poem at all.

But by taking the time to write it I kept myself from a major fall!

 

Do not stumble, do not muddle your thoughts to far worse than it is!

Now what was the stress management technique I used?

Ah, yes,….this is a quiz!

 

Simple and easy what to do – divert your attention – and God will bless you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is a post I have republished before….HUMOR. My girlfriend’s complaints about aging.

August 26, 2016

Why is the only hair on my body that hasn’t turned gray the long black hair growing from my nose?

Why didn’t anyone ever tell me that not only would everything “drop” as I aged, but my feet would also get bigger?

Why was I only told my bones would get weaker as I aged, and not that I would grow bony protrusions and knobby outgrowths everywhere on my body?

Why didn’t anybody tell me I would not only gain more wisdom than ever in my lifetime, but no body would listen to me?

How did I somehow miss that men not only loose their hair and get a receding hairline – but women often do as well?

I thought only Pinocchio’s nose grew bigger.

Why is it when you successfully age with good health no one will honor that with reasonable life insurance…every year I stay healthy my insurance rates go up!

You know the joy of having less hair to shave on your legs when you age is diminished by the fact all that hair grows on your face.

“Smile wrinkles” show you are happy. That’s crap. Just another group of wrinkles on your face.

I can eat the same food I always did, exercise the same, and still, when I look into the mirror I can see the fat accumulating on my stomach, hips and thighs. If I try to loose weight more wrinkles appear – gain it – my boobs hang down even further.

Shirley Temple can have dimples.   I am sick of the dimples all over my body. And no matter what anybody tries to sell you – they will never go away once you have them!

Okay stop eating candy and rub cream all over your legs. The dimples will still increase and you won’t get to eat your sugar quota or have the money to buy it!

Being a grandma is great. Being the built in baby sitter isn’t.

I was in the yard picking up dog poop (with a shovel of course), and also getting rid of mushrooms that grow wild and can be poisonous to dogs. . “Ah ah”, I thought, “two of those huge mushrooms right in front of me.” I picked them up, and to my dismay, it was two firm pieces of dog poop! One thing about not using your glasses when you get older is you don’t see as well without them.

The next time I went out, it was with glasses on. I love autumn – all the colors, and the crunch of leaves beneath my feet. What I don’t love is picking up dog poop with my hand for the second time, thinking it was acorns! Guess it’s time to get new glasses.

I went to the doctor a few days ago. I knew I would be hooked up to acupuncture needles and laying flat on my tummy for 30 minutes, so I thought since I was loaded with nasty gas, I would step into the hall and relieve myself quickly before being called in. I looked to the right and up the stairs and released a loud and long fart. I had forgotten to look to the left – there was a woman a couple of feet away on her cell phone. I tried to pretend it didn’t happen and slipped back into the office quickly.

I remember when I was married to an ass, one time we were at our son’s pack meeting for cub scouts, sitting in the very back of a crowed room. He thought he would be funny and let a loud and enormous fart and turned to me and called my name loudly – and indignantly…. as if I’d done it. Everyone looked at me. Some giggled and others looked disgusted. He paid for that one later.

Why is it my nose is running all the time now, and with no place to go. The world gets more enclosed as you get older. Most people walk by and go “Ugh, an old person.” They try to get away quick as if they will catch being old. Well here is the news people, if you don’t get old you are dead!

I saw a commercial with two old people flirting, dancing and kissing. Even I was appalled. Take it to a motel, and make it one with no mirrors on the closet doors – follow the new adage – “what happens in the motel, stays in the motel.”

Lastly in my list of complaints about aging…I think the funniest of all. My girlfriend said she didn’t have her glasses on and she brushed her teeth with hemorrhoid cream. She said it made her gag and almost throw up. That’s not the funniest thing about this – she did it twice.! WEAR YOUR GLASSES GIRLFRIEND!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Following up on president mentioning this last evening…..

July 28, 2016

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

“That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.”

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A history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States.

For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent: A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Neither aiming at originality of principle or sentiment, nor yet copied from any particular and previous writing, it was intended to be an expression of the American mind, and to give to that expression the proper tone and spirit called for by the occasion.[81]

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Of course most people think Michelle Obama is wonderful.  I thought she gave a good speech (as did the president – though it was mostly about him).  The one thing I question in her speech was instead of pulling us all together, I think she perhaps put another little “divider” into the speech by saying, “I have two beautiful BLACK daughters.”  I believe we are all intelligent enough that we have noticed.  Would it not have been better just to say, “I have two beautiful daughters.”  I have a beautiful daughter too, but I don’t think I have ever mentioned in a gathering that she is a beautiful white daughter……maybe I am color blind, and just go by hearts.

 

 

 

PUPPY

August 25, 2015

When I first got our new puppy, at 9 weeks old, our five year old was very jealous. She still may be at times, but she also loves Axel, and worries when he isn’t with us…I know dogs aren’t supposed to think like us, but since I broke my back (and before) I have spent 24/7 with my Dakota and the puppy.  They have wonderful emotions and understanding English too!

Back to the photo.  Axel is now 8 months old and they are inseparable.  This is how the puppy got to Dakota…..I call the photo “Bonding”.  I love this shot of Dakota.  She was never a mommy but she is a tender spirit.bonding

Cloth grocery bags, remote controls, and border control

November 2, 2014

This is why I vote for the cloth bag to put groceries in.Toe use

My bag broke and a can of dog food hit exactly where the toenail hits the skin. Ouch!

Probably will loose the nail.  This photo was taken two weeks after the fact.

The only drawback I can see for cloth bags is when there is a big family, it will take some large bags, or big trash bags. Don’t know how that will work….

———————–Remotes

Am I the only lame woman around,or do you think most women HATE remote controls? I hate them all. The reason my husband is in charge of them is because if I start to use them I still get totally lost!

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Lastly, what I cannot figure out is why our government is so “dull” (in the brain area) about keeping our borders safe.

The great wall of China was built in the 7th Century BC. to protect the Empire against intrusions.

The wall is 5,500 miles long and is one of the wonders of the world.

7th cent. BCOh, I remember why we can’t accomplish something like that. It is all about the way the government wants to do things, and the swaying of monies. The peasants have no say in anything really.

Mid-term elections cost at least a billion dollars – these folks pay millions each to be elected. It’s pretty lucrative LIFETIME EMPLOYMENT. Even if you aren’t elected again, you still get tons of perks.

Sorry about the photo being blurry – it is a copy of a copy!

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Can’t say any more than that as it is a beautiful day and I am going to go outside and enjoy these moments in time.

Here are some flowers to brighten your day if you are unable to enjoy the outdoors today.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAMay these lovely flowers add a bit of sunshine to your day – and perhaps, a smile!

God bless you and those in the circle of your lives.

Oprah has a billion dollars, but I have style!

October 16, 2014

I opted to model in this beret a “few” years ago – at least more than 25!  Yikes.Oprah

Mine was angora.  Ha ha.  I just think this is very funny.  “They say” every style that is old will come back again!  Proven here.  I do have some bell bottom slacks that I have had since the 60’s.  Wide bell bottoms to dance in.  Of course they are a tad tighter now!

Sometimes things are just funny to me.  Humor is healing, you know – and for me that is necessary!  Actually humor is very important for all of us to remember these days!

SMILE!  God bless you all.

GOOD MORNING!

October 6, 2014

I believe it is a beautiful day.  Even if I didn’t, I would talk myself into it by creating new brain cell impressions:  It’s a beautiful day.  It’s a beautiful day.  It’s a beautiful day.

It works.  Thoughts become your life.  That’s kind of general, but it is true.  Also the creating of new brain cells is true!  We are a precision and wonderful human machine.  Far better than any mechanical thing!  Believe it!

Someone ask me if I would republish one of my posts, so that is what I am doing today.  If you haven’t read it, I hope you enjoy it.  I have published over six hundred and fifty posts!  Yikes – I must love to write!  Yes, I do.

So here it is.  Enjoy and CREATE a beautiful day for yourself and those in your circle of life.  Time is fleeting so take advantage of every single moment.

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Rambling from the heart

Beautiful is a friend who always there for you, even if she should be taking care of herself.
Beautiful is kindness that comes directly from the heart, and is unending for those in need.
Beautiful is a smile that doesn’t have to be pasted on, but one that reflects joy and sincerity.
Beautiful is character that molds itself from life’s experiences, and grows in quality and positive traits.
Beautiful is being able to face someone and look them in the eyes and know they love you too.
Beautiful is faith that is recognized, and credit given to He that paid the highest sacrifice.
Beautiful is genuine motivation to give something in life that shares healing with others.

Beautiful is a word that cannot be fully described, yet you know when you see real beauty because there is a vibrance, and a shining glow that can only be captured with the word beautiful!

Be beautiful  – it’s possible for all – for beauty lies within the heart, so open yours and let your light shine.  When you love, love will come to you bountifully.

Learn to give, and you learn to live!

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This photograph may have you wondering.  I will explain.  One day my daughter said her two children were bored.  She got creative.  She let them make a tent from moving a few things, using a few blankets, and a flashlight.  They had a blast and when done invited her to join them.  You can’t see the kiddos, but you can see my daughter’s leg.  Have fun with your children.  As I have said before, time is fleeting.  To finish – at some point, they all pitched in to clean things up.  What a great afternoon!

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