Posts Tagged ‘God’

Thank you!

July 7, 2017

Photograph taken in Corvallis Oregon.  Added just for a reminder that there is still beauty all around us!

fullsizeoutput_5aI am nothing without love, and nothing without my faith of the Unseen Spiritual Power and Creator of it all. His presence is within me, flooding me with a will to live and the power to carry on, no matter what the future appears to be.

He holds me up, pushes me along, and gives me the encouragement to keep trying. I see Jesus struggling along the path, having done nothing but love and enlighten, being tortured as he marched to His grisly end on the planet, for a time.

His time with His creations should have been filled with intense love and trust. That baby boy, to grow to be a man, was filled with curiosity and kindness. He did no wrong to anyone. His faith in His Father was unshaken, and yet He was tortured and ridiculed for never denying his heritage and position as the leader of love and forgiveness.

My time is limited. Just when I feel I am not qualified to even accept the Grace offered as a full bounty, I am reminded by someone I love that I am His child still.

I must move WITH grace, having been given this gift freely. I must accept that because He stills sings in my heart, without me ever touching Him, He touches me, and still moves me to tears because of the thought of His love for me..for all His creations. I must accept that no matter what, He wants me with him forever…and you.

All my flaws, all my insecurities, all the times of strife I let this world almost get the better of me. He has never left my heart and my mind. He stands steadfast with me amidst the horrors of the world and will always be my shield and source.

I am ever grateful for His subtle and enduring love that moves me back to Him again with just mere words. I am forever of His mind and Love, and forgive, even myself, for my sometimes awkward and inept words and ways. For those times I let evil grasp me and fool me.

Once again I am empowered and able to move with grace and beauty. I simply awoke and I am transformed again. Create a beautiful day. Fill it with love and forgiveness. Each moment we are able to forgive and begin again!

We should all love one another, even if just in an act of kindness. Smile for no reason. See the beauty of each individual. Take a breath and believe YOU are able to change your world, and the worlds of those who are a part of you life…even if you simply pass by in the market. You are in charge. Use the innate power that fills the space in your heart saved only for God and Godly things. For heavens sake, and the sake our being – hug someone! I love you.

Marsha

How to Start a Fine Day

May 26, 2017

It’s easy.  Just pray!

“Good morning sweet Lord. You let me be a living soul just another day! Thank you.”
“I will try to be loving, forgiving and kind. I will smile, which will open my heart.”
“I will endeavor not to be judgmental, yet keep the laws you require.
You give me all the tools I need to keep my body healthy, and
My heart seeking your higher ways.”

“Forgive me, my Lord, for lost days, weakness and poor choices.
For excuses I made to enable me to walk the tight rope
between heaven and hell…Still your forgive me, most simply, because I believe in your Son.”

“I am excited now to see how I can make you glad you love me today .
I want you to be at ease with with your choice to make me your child.
With your loving rules and guidelines fresh in my mind, I will take a breath now,
And leave the world yesterday behind.””

Though I cannot comprehend the vastness and forever or you,
I am made in your image, and I know, the Spirit will help me get through.
Two requests I ask from deep within, forgive me not knowing it all, and not fully being able to comprehend the complexity of you and your Son.”

“I do read your Book, and study the Word. Somethings are easy,
and others still go beyond the ability of me to fully grasp the truths of this Book.”
“I will not give up, I will not give in – I will continue to seek your charity
(another word for love) – I will drop to my knees in gratitude, and raise my arms above, in praise.”

“Humbly I ask for those I love to open their eyes
For those that have a heart for you to quit listening to “their” lies.
Your children abound, even those who are yet to discover the peace and the life you offer to all.”

“Please kindly nudge them, before the great fall.
Humbly I thank thee, humbly I arise.
With the ultimate sacrifice of your precious Son in my mind,
with tears in my eyes – I now stand tall.”

“With your Spirit to guide me, and your power all around me – My heart implodes with fullness.
The place you give us all, reserved just for you and your Son – is my true heart. I have already won! I will smile. I will love. I will bounce with the true joy of YOU!
I will pass it forward, that is just what I will do.”

“I love you sweet Lord. I think of you all the time throughout the day. I will hold my tongue, love hard, and be on my way.!

“Amen. (So be it).”

A simple dream

May 24, 2017

Another dream, another night. The first dream was simple and clear. Cooking breakfast, kissing my loved ones good by for the day – knowing we all go our separate way.

In my second dream I was not able to put my foot on the brake while my car was in drive. Forward it went as I struggled to reach the brake. I hadn’t been moving so the thud was small and the jeep was barely hit – but enough to move the other sitting.

“I am not simpatico with the car I drive right now,” I thought…it was a worry. All the bells and whistles. Safety factors I love, but all I want to do is turn the music up loud and drive as fast as I can on a straightaway. Thelma and Louise came to mind.

Before I got in I had tied 3 sets of keys into a large red scarf. A strong gust of wind picked it up, lifting it out of my palm I watched while it became a red kite, flying now almost too high to see. It flew until out of sight and I assumed dropped a few blocks away.

As I stood there I realized, there was nothing I could do! I sat down and thought, “I need to go get busy. I will divert my own attention from this problem and perhaps it will resolve on its own. I will trust God.”

It was a strange dream, as if I were awake and really thinking these things.
The dream was over. I opened my eyes.

Why would I bother to write this down? I have no clue.

——————————————————————————

Here it is ten days later than when that dream manifested to paper. I re-read it and one paragraph hit me right between the eyes! I awoke this morning facing a problem that is a conundrum (a confusing and difficult problem to resolve.). I was just mulling over in my brain ANY possible resolve to the problem..thus far, I find none!

Then by chance I saw this in a folder with some writing I am doing, and found my answer! Here is the paragraph:

As I stood there I realized, there was nothing I could do! I sat down and thought, “I need to go get busy. I will divert my own attention from this problem and perhaps it will resolve on its own. I will trust God.”

Conundrum resolved for the time. Got to get up and get busy! CREATE a wonderful day full of moments to cherish!

Begin Again for the Last Time

April 25, 2017

Being human includes having all the flaws, pain, and trials one can endure. Those first two humans, in my realm of beliefs,  wanted to know all about the things that make God, God. They wanted to taste of evil and that old snake satan was right there as he is now – prodding and pushing.

I am in the most weakened state of my life now  You can see some scars physically, and are aware of changes mentally.  I believed when I awoke this morning, something may have finally severed any real dreams, or chances of dreams I still had.  Memories besmeared, future questionable, and heart nearly broken in half.  Life has put me in a pit again.

No one can possibly know what disabilities I deal wit, that manifest each day as I awake and wonder if I want to get out of bed at all, or go back to sleep, “perchance to dream”.

I won’t tell anyone the extent of my injuries.  It would be impossible to explain anyway.  They didn’t just begin with my back bursting. Life managed to seep into my thoughts and like a baby near the edge of a high staircase, someone let go of my hand when I was just a young woman and I fell down the stairs, hitting my head and scraping my arms and legs. I knew I was hurt but the baby just kept crawling up the stairs to see what was at the top. Again and again my immaturity, or selfishness, or fear of overwhelming pain physically and mentally again, tossed me down the stairs….sometimes in the air all the way to the bottom, and sometimes hitting each step squarely – and hard!  Somehow I always managed to pull myself together and begin to crawl upward again!

I saw so many humans falling and as I grew I tried to push and pull, and help them back up the stairs. My heart grew weary, but I was tenacious – broken bones, swollen limbs and mental exhaustion never stopped me.  Hesitation and fear – yes!  Desire to feel the wonder of life again manifest through “events” seemed to keep me trying….

The God Unknown, knew my name. He kept calling, yet I kept falling….prey to a mis-step of a different kind each time.

Life’s temptations masqueraded into glorious apparitions. The snake lay in wait for a moment of weakness, and I found myself tumbling down the stairs again and again. Though my life was going by me so fast my vision was blurred, I kept on it. I kept crawling up the stairs, which now wound round and round, and increased in numbers and difficulty. I wanted to get to the top.

I could hear a sweet voice that beckoned my heart and I pushed upward, amidst a crowded group of people – some trying with me, and others running the other way. Confusion struck hearts like bolts of lightening. I watched with horror as some fell from above me and turning my head I saw I could do nothing to help as I watched them falling far beyond my vision, and still falling as I lost sight of them. I could barely help myself.

Still I turned and began the climb once more. It was almost more than I could endure, and the solitude I had known was replaced with a shrieking and loud voices above and below me. I turned and sat as the stairs had grown much larger now, and I found just enough space to sit and bend my elbows so I could put my head down and cry. I weeped, I wailed, the wet tears
drenched my clothes and I tried to wipe them with my arms so no one would slip on the now, almost vertical stairs…so small my foot needed to turn sideways to fit.

I prayed. I couldn’t move from my exhaustion and delusions bursting in my head. What I had known-wasn’t. What I had believed was in part lies- so many lies that fooled me. So many falls because I had blinded myself to run away from all the pain. I thought it was the end of me. I thought this was my eternity. Climbing, forever climbing.

I sat. It was as if I was a baby again and I was alone on the stairs. I felt a large hand from above grasp my shoulder. I turned and the hand clasp mine and began to gently pull me to the next stair going upward.

I was a blend of thoughts and visions, experiences and horrors…..beauty and hope. I could see
the top of the stairs just a few steps away now. The voice at the top spoke to me, saying “I’ve done what I can throughout the years. I chose to silently be the push you needed throughout your life, and sometimes the pull. I haven’t given up on you, but these last steps are steps that you must take alone. I will be there but It is time. I will be waiting”

“ I expect to see you when the time comes for you to arrive. In the meanwhile, feel free to speak to me, I hope in gratitude for my company all these years, but the power with which you will take these steps, though few, will be the most difficult of all. Do not expect it otherwise.”

“Do not be befuddled with illusive worry about everything. All those things will work for the best-in my time. I know many who have yet to know me. Trust me. Those who have brushed next to you, those who have been a part of you, those who know Love, know me, and those Spirits are a kin and will be just fine. Trust me, I say again. Keep endeavoring to reach the top; they will be there in my time. I expect to see you. I expect no less.”

FYI

April 21, 2017

If anyone on the planet read my post yesterday, there are two things to keep in mind.

  1.  I am not living in guilt.  I learned something valuable, and life, after all is about learningl
  2. I believe she was an angel sent to me to help heal me after my accident and feeling my life was never going to be good again.  She gave me unconditional love.
  3.  She had arthritis and lots of pain from an injury when she was young. It was probably for her relief from growing older and very disabled, and relief from pain (in part) that she passed..  I trust God’s timing.
  4. I believe any living thing that has a “loving Spirit” will be with us in eternity. A spirit like that the God I love, I believe, would not end permanently.

 

I am not certain why I still write after 700 posts over the years….but I am glad for the opportunity because I am still one of the most positive people I’ve ever known, and still full of love  and life experiences to share.  Besides think of my brain if I had not been able to get all theses thoughts “out.”

Okay now you have to guess my age – but I am not going to tell you. Have a bitchin’ day. A cool one!  NOT a “dope” day…..I cringe when I hear that used as an expression of good……OVER and OUT.

Today

February 23, 2017

I woke up exceptionally early this morning. I lay in bed thinking. I thought about prayers. I thought about God. I thought about my life, and how much of it I’ve missed!

Really. I feel like it has slipped through my fingers like a palm full of oil when you open your fingers….drip, drip, drip away. My back ached (it always does, but that is the way it is) – when I fell, landing on my back, I knew I was in trouble. I just didn’t know how much.

My Rottie came over and sat next to me and I instinctively reached up and felt the lush soft fur just below her neck.

I looked at the blue sky, dotted with those clouds that form into something when you watch them pass. I had just been thanking God for everything in my life being calm and peaceful, and close to perfect. Then wouldn’t you know it, life took me on a turn I shall not forget, though after four years of challenges (and I mean hell sometimes), I sit here typing another piece of my heart.

“Everything changes”, mama used to say. “Everything except God and my love for you.”
I knew she meant it.

We can criticize others. Blame circumstances on conditions, and punish ourselves for making so many mistakes along the way. But isn’t there enough of that going on?

Oh God, I want to be of value, of service to you. We are all human as you are well aware, and
for US, I ask you remain faithful in your patience and grace. I still can’t figure out why I have been given so many opportunities to “rise above my circumstances, and survive!”

We are small little human beings in a maze of life. The majority of us, I still believe, still having love, potential, and goodness.

Guide our thoughts and deeds. Perhaps you give us a jolt a time or two to recognize how little time we have and really how very much power we have in just a word or deed.

My mouth has been filthy at times in my life (not as bad as Ashley Judd – her mama must be proud) – and sometimes my actions less than acceptable. I know that. I also know because I believe in you and your Son Jesus Christ, I am forgiven! I am loved. Jesus took the brunt of my deeds and paid the price. I never take that for granted.

Please keep vigilant over your children and give us a push in the right direction when we are overcome by the trash with the loudest voices. We do not have to succumb.

My husband readies himself to leave and devote his time and health and energy to keeping us “floating” above debt and despair. God bless ALL who must leave their families to provide for them.

Please guide us, your creations, to kind words and at least one thoughtful and unexpected act of love today. We don’t need to tell anyone….just do something. THANK YOU. I stand on my small bandwagon to declare my love for you, and the POWER and ENDLESS energy to heal and keeping going……if only we ask and believe.

Picking up the pieces

September 25, 2016

 

I opened the refrigerator and saw the crystal bowl, as if in slow motion, drop in waves and then hit the floor with a mighty sound of glass splintering and grapes breaking off into all directions.

People use God’s name is so many situations. Thank God it’s cooled down. Thank God no one was hurt. Thank God the storm was less than expected. I often wonder if the name of God is even recognized any more, and if God has become just a phrase to express relief. I wonder if people really mean THANK GOD.

Thank God no splinters flew into the eyes of my puppy, standing off a far, looking as if he had done something wrong. I wondered if he would run off to the “naughty room”, his dog house, as he does when he carries something in his mouth that doesn’t belong there.

No, thank God he stood still and just watched, along with my good old girl, Dakota. Black as the night, wide eyed as children, they just waited for some reaction from me. To their surprise, I laughed. Why not.

My husband says to open any door or cupboard anywhere in the house is like looking for a bomb to explode. This time he was right. No one got cut. The bowl was just a material object, and the only other loss was a bunch of grapes.

I cleaned everything up. Looked at the precarious position of an opened twelve pack of Ginger Ale, I and decided to leave them where they were on the third shelf. Why not live dangerously….

It was so much easier to laugh and smile than to let the current situation overcome my senses and my life. I knew this too would pass.

Now think of politics. Let it go. It is not going to be life-changing to throw away all the moments and days we spend worrying. Let it go, and as it’s been said many times before….

Let it go and let God! The only control we really have is our response to life. I tried being miserable and it sucked. So I gave it up.

Invisible Injuries

September 15, 2016

We all have them.  Whether they be mental or physical, they all come with the territory of being human.

No visual example of adversity. No example of individual interior adversity – mentally or physically!

The difficult part is NO ONE on planet earth can fully understand what YOU personally may be tackling as far as these unseen or unknown challenges.  No one will ever know one hundred percent.

This is why in order to succeed in life, we must attend to our own “healing” of mind-body-and spirit, and we must forgive those who don’t GET where we are coming from.

It may be the depths of hell to us, but not even within the view of others understanding.

The reason I lay all of this on US is because I am going through those invisible injuries.

I have had a pile of them all my life (off and on) – WE ALL DO.  They are all different and all in different degrees of the need to heal.

Truth be told (as politicians often say – if they only would!)  NO ONE but YOU can do the healing.  I will add in (because these are MY thoughts, and this is my place to offer up my thoughts), that if you have a belief system beyond yourself, life will be leaps and bounds easier to handle and the mountains less tenuous to climb.

I am fortunate because I have faith that cannot be shaken no matter how difficult my life become.  Honestly  life does not get easier as you age, it gets harder.

BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN you cannot have laughter, and joy, and love, and reapall the rewards we humans still have available.

The key is how you CHOOSE to respond to your own problems, and the tenderness with which you CHOOSE to have understanding and forgiveness of others.  Personally, I can NEVER hold a grudge.  Being unforgiving and judgemental festers inside you like an infected sore.  When you forgive (even if you don’t mean it at first), you begin to heal from within!  REALLY.  You release ugly and negative thoughts, and are able to use your own healing powers for yourself!

Another great way to handle stress of invisible problems is to breathe.  Get plenty of oxygen and your body will “think” better and “feel” better.  It is THE WAY of your body. Think about it.  Slow or stop breathing and what happens?  Less oxygen, less optimal thinking and healing, and ultimately death!  So is it important?  What do you think?

Lastly, I guarantee I have at least thirty to forty things going on within me physically and mentally that no one can ever understanding.  But what I realize is it is UP TO ME to handle it all.  I tried being miserable.  It sucked.  So I gave it up!

Besides I use a trick.  I don’t know when it began, perhaps in the womb, but when an unexpected scenario confronts me, I ALWAYS try to find the humor in it – and laugh!  I know you can’t laugh at everything, but it doesn’t hurt to try.  Humor can really save your day, and your life!

You can rise above WHATEVER it is that is aching to pull you down.  Try not to exclusively dwell on the problems.  Divert your own attention by accomplishing tasks that lay before you.  When you feel like a pity party, TAKE A BREATH – think of it like ammo and a secret weapon.  It is.  If you think this is all pie in the sky and just words –

YOU WOULD BE WRONG!  I would not waste my precious moments, and each moment is precious to me, expounding on words with no meaning.  Thoughts with no depth.

So please think about it.  Read this again. I am serious. You won’t waste the minute it takes, and this time think about applying it to your life!  You must get into the habit of this way of thinking.  We are creatures of habit.  Please read it again and this time think about it with YOU IN MIND.

REPETITION IS THE MOTHER OF ALL LEARNING. Repetition is the mother of all learning. Repetition is the mother of all learning. Repetition is the mother of all learning.  Now close your eyes and say it.

God bless you, and I so very much mean it!  Flowers for you courtesy Park City, Utah  I have no idea what kind they are but it looked like they were placed gently on top of these bushes, and they were beautiful!Park City FlowersJPG.jpg

 

Here is the Confession

September 6, 2016

Here is the confession. Since my accident and incidents therein,

Too often I fall into deep depression.

 

I know in cyberspace there are fellow humans of like mind,

sometimes we search for answers, but answers do not find.

 

There is nothing shameful about having depression you see,

It happens in this lifetime, next door and across the sea,

It happens to us all -to you, and even me.

 

We are human. We feel love, terror, and pain, trauma.

Depression can hit us all – depression is not drama!

 

I awoke this morning covered with sorrow like dense fog.

Unable to find the departure, chained like a wild dog.

 

“What is the purpose of life?” I thought. My life is changed forever, and not for better.

I had a pity party – a pitiful one – no one came.

 

It was only I, raging like I was waging a war against myself.

Then praying, while rather insane, I placed my mind upon a shelf.

 

At last I thought, I knew what to do. Divert my own attention to something else……and maybe you should too.

 

So I left the room I was working in, took a breath or two and dropped to my knees.

“Give me help dear Lord, I prayed, let my heart feel at peace, if you please.”

 

Here I lay in bed, with laptop resting on my legs.

Writing simple poetry, trying to turn a phrase.

 

If I dwell on my sorrow, and cry and whimper, I will to hell cross the line,

Then I won’t smile or have joy in this moment of time.

 

All we have is this moment to live,

I must turn my thoughts not to get, but to love and to give.

 

I lay here and realize I still can write.

I can see in the daytime, and find rest at night.

 

Within there is a flicker of my light that should shine for many reasons I know.

I will find a few to jostle my memory, and wrestle depression with strength just to show….

 

I can DO whatever I think I can! My sorrows are few compared to many a man.

I do not know how much I time I have left to look at my life – nor days to enjoy.

 

I want to be an example of faith and of love,

I will keep praying for power from that of above.

 

I AM better already, can you read and see? Like I would with a child who needs help,

I diverted my own attention, and the task set me free.

 

Change your thoughts, change your emotions.

Use your wits to climb from the pits.

 

You may think this a silly poem, and some might think it not a poem at all.

But by taking the time to write it I kept myself from a major fall!

 

Do not stumble, do not muddle your thoughts to far worse than it is!

Now what was the stress management technique I used?

Ah, yes,….this is a quiz!

 

Simple and easy what to do – divert your attention – and God will bless you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What do you think of when you awake?

May 15, 2016

I wake and my brain begins to think of everything! Why does bad things happen to good people? Can we turn things around just by thinking differently? What makes me care about people I don’t even know, that are half way around the world? Why do we always try to pigeonhole a person before we know the real person? What makes us keep trying when everything has gone wrong? Have all people thought of suicide at least one time? If someone told me they would kill me would I really stand up for what I believe? Are puppies just a beautiful gift from a creative creator? Dreams are so real. Is this life really real, or are my dreams real and this is just a manifestation of my mind?

Then I get up and head for the coffee. In five minutes of lying in my bed and trying to wake up, m mind has already asked hundreds, not just a few, questions about it all!

My best bet, and this is the truth, is to drop to my knees before rising, and give thanks for another breath, and lay the concerns in my brain before my Master. I know I ask more thank I give thanks, but thanks is always on my mind, and when I sway just a bit off my true path, my life begins to diminish in small currents of unrest and dissatisfaction. It always happens. I just don’t always recognize it until I am bursting into tears and wondering why good things happen to bad people.

It is like a cycle an alcoholic follows. Don’t drink. Just to ease the concerns of the day.

If one made me relax, two will help a bit more. The increase of alcohol is in small increments. It may take days to reach for and consume “more than enough” to be drunk and disoriented. To be waking the next morning with regret and sorrow and no memory of the horrible things someone says you did. It may happen that same hour. Open your eyes and your life is passed by. It could have happened to me. Don’t drink.

Without God there is a hole in my heart that cannot be filled. Without God there is no peace beyond understanding. Without God love diminishes and that empty space becomes filled with treachery and evil that lurks everywhere to snap you up and eat you alive.

With God, all things are possible.

Therein, I will forgo the second cup of coffee and make my way to my bed and carefully get to my knees. I love to pray with surrender and respect, and when I get on my knees I feel I am honoring God a bit more – though I know He accepts prayers at any time and anywhere. He loves to hear from his children…even if they have yet to learn they are His. Even if they hesitate to use His proper name, as a parent hearing his child say “daddy”, and though he may be far away, the child’s daddy will hear the child’s call.

Love one another. Forgive one another. Love your Creator. Remember these are our tasks. We are not here to judge one another. Ease your mind and let the Spirit fill His home made within our early bodies and mind.

As we think so shall we become.   Mind over matter. Be grateful for each Nano second and waste them not!

You might this this photo isn’t related to this post – and it really isn’t – but I wanted to share something I snapped while out running errands a week or so ago.  These are my favorite type clouds, and for a moment they took me to a dream state of peeking out from between the clouds to check out earth!  I moment of fantasy and pleasure out of no where.  They are abundant – just open your eyes and have a blessed day!

cloudsCulumus clouds                                             Splendid, eh?