Just curious

August 23, 2017

How are you?

Good Morning!

August 22, 2017

GOOD MORNING! Good morning my brothers and sisters. To be writing and to be reading means we are alive and I say thank you Great Spirit, Creator beyond our understanding and comprehension……thank you! Counselor who never tires of hearing my prayers, and never leaves me.

You have given us heart and the ability to smile. You have given human beings the instant spark to be strong and open to helping others when the need is great.

You have given us strength of mind and body when tragedy comes upon us, to rise and to move onward and upward.

You are the song in my heart and the backbone in this tenacious and weary body. You have given me the power to move beyond my own ability and the drive to go on…

The mysteries of the skies and beauty of the wispy clouds that run across the warm of the sun, but for a moment, are wonders to behold.

You have given us an appetite to learn more about everything we see and touch.
Often I have given less than I was able because sometimes I am only human, and forget that I have you within me, to brighten my outlook and stretch beyond my limits.

You have given me faith. From whence it comes I know not, but like the ocean breeze it cools and wets my face awakening this beating heart to begin again.

With the light of the day my mind begins to challenge me to get up and move and make this fine instrument once again, regardless of the pressing in of life, open my arms and lift them to praise you for so many miracles that happen each moment, many of which we simply do not take the time or energy to recognize.

Like an old friend, I trust you to elevate my thoughts, strength my mind, bring peace and happiness from within and let it burst into fruition to add to life for me and those in my circle of life.

Thank you oh Great Spirit of forgiveness, patience, and love. Thank you for knowing I cannot understand it all. For that which does not come to me clearly – please forgive me. I will try again to make you happy in my creation, after all is said and done.

I was given so much, and all you ask is that I have faith and love.

My blessed Creator, you are the grandest of all, and yet I am free to address you and love you. Mysterious and amazing.

Lovingly, your humble servant,
Marsha

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Subtle Overthrow in Progress?

August 15, 2017

“There came an alien race to earth, intend on conquering all, and the name of the alien race was is alcohol.”

“Aliens are slowly taking over the entire planet by disguising themselves as alcohol.”

“Soon we will all  be so addicted and they will  throw us aside, and turn into the real aliens! They will have the earth to themselves, and without a fight!”

“There may be temporary upheavals but soon all will succumb to the subtle power of many of  them who are still in disguise.”

“The things that happen during a bout with aliens assist them in their ascent – things they will attest to others in the universe —they murdered and raped and cheated, and they knew the risks.  Still they dabbled.”

“They did it to themselves in the final analysis.  They fell to their knees and the gods of the toilet by choice.  No one was forced, only prodded.”

“Still a few lived. They  were unable to survive the stench and view of the aliens true forms.  They died of fright in the black of the night.”

“So have another drink, my friend.  It can’t hurt…………………….

………………………………………or can it?”

 

Pain

August 4, 2017

What happens when the pain is so bad that suddenly you think for a moment “I can’t can’t handle this. The pain is too much!”

Everyone says – “You can handle it – learn to deal with the hand you’ve been dealt. We all have to deal with pain…that’s life!”

Well……..those words are entirely true, but what I say today is “Phewy! Aarrghh! Crappola!
PLEASE don’t preach to the choir! Leave that to God.

We all do have to deal with pain and it sucks. What particularly sucks is that no one else on the planet, even if they have practically the same injury or problem, can understand your pain!
No one can jump right into your shoes, though many really kind and good hearted people (who have possibly dealt with lots of pain in his or her life) may sincerely try. It just isn’t happening.

It is YOUR pain, and yours alone. I can’t even describe the pain that almost left me unable to put any weight on my right ankle this afternoon. It didn’t last a lengthy time, like the pain that has become my constant companion from by back exploding. I guess you could say I am used to that pain. It varies in intensity, but shows up regularly each day, sometime after I put weight on my little frame of bones.

I tell you, God made the human body so strong and resilient that it never ceases to amaze me. During a lifetime I have participated in, or seen an ocean of pain from multiple sources….and yet people have healed, as best is possible with time and a bit of concentrated work.

Of course when you break that rare crystal bowl that sat on the table, even though you fixed it professionally…it will always have a weakness. It may look fine sitting on the table, but perhaps with time someone will put too much weight on it, or be careless handling it, and the bowl could succumb to that one incident of tragedy, then it hit the floor!

The human body is much stronger than the bowl. When I was in my twenties it seemed as if I challenged the endurance and healing power of the body, mind and spirit – simultaneously! I think that is still known as “partying”. Thank you God for your grace and in your undeserved mercy… I survived “myself”!

I sit down to write just a paragraph or two and it always winds up to be something I could just keep doing on. I love to write – I actually love to share life in this way….experiences I’ve had, thoughts I have, experiences of others, and those moments that make life worth “going beyond the pain!….back to the point of this post.

What was the point? Something about pain………hahahaha! The number one way to handle pain is DIVERSON, and that is exactly what I did! It works! (I really hope you don’t have too much pain to handle. I know it sucks. But it is “do-able”.). I send love and healing vibrations- and I am not just saying that! Ask my husband. He says “How can you care about people your don’t even know?” Well, that is easy! I am human, aren’t you? We are all REALLY connected in that way. Besides, Jesus said to love one another, and I love Jesus! Makes sense, eh?

Hug yourself. I just hugged myself and I needed it! You deserve a good hug!

This is a post that hasn’t been checked for errors and is 100% spontaneous. I hope it was worthy of a read. At least it was free!

hollywood (or as I prefer to call it hollyweird)

July 30, 2017

This is just a short post  expressing MY point of view about that group who like to be known as “stars”. (NOT ALL, mind you, but a majority).

I am sick to death of all these “do-gooders” who say “This is good – this is bad”. They are human beings like the rest of us, except they make way too much money for what they do. Similar to the wage of athletes!

Here are a few of the things they present to us, after voicing big opinions and donating time (NOT MONEY), to their special causes and things that are really none of their damn business.
One thing they don’t know about is the REAL WORLD of human beings.

Used to love to dance to madonna when I taught fitness, but she has been such a loose canyon, a piece of trash and pervert for so many years I can’t even stand her not one tiny bit. Then standing up for women and saying the things she said – not my representative. Nor is the other piece of garbage (won’t mention her name) – who brought up women’s personal monthly time, in tasteless defense of what…trash talk?)

Now hollyweird in general. If you have been reading my blog you know when I have no respect for someone or something or place – I don’t capitalize. To me that reflects my disrespect in my small way.

I am up to my limit on hearing the name “Jesus” or “Jesus Christ” as a swear word. Even if I weren’t a Christian (of my own beliefs,) I would have respect for a man the caliber of Jesus in His historical record – as one of the most amazing human beings that has ever lived…

I understand when people say goddammit…don’t like it, but many believe there is more than one god. To offend me you would have to use the Great Spirit’s proper name, which is Jehovah.

But STOP with the using Jesus name as a swear word! How would it be if I said barrack Obama as a swear word, or someone you admired or loved. Remember my capitalization rule.

Next is the blatant disregard for the fact cigarettes kill people. Hollyweird is making it look cool again. NOT cool. Have you ever been with anyone dying of cancer or unable to breathe?

High on the list is violence and it’s association with sex and love. It makes me literally want to puke when I see some of the trash that is presented to the public. And the ratings are a big fat joke.

I went to rent movies for the weekend for a change and spent a while looking. I didn’t rent anything. I can tell you whats wrong with the people who watch lots of movies…hollyweird is brain-washing us!

EVERYTHING HAS BECOME COMMONPLACE! There is NOTHING special any more. You meet someone and within ten minutes he has backed you up against a wall and is doing you…not even a first date.

The ever so small percentage of honestly “unusual” people is brought to the forefront and PUSHED on us. IT is OKAY to ignore the physiology of the human body. We (even in schools now) are being trained to be unisex…..Soon everyone will work for the man and then watch a movie to be told what to think and what to do (Television is definitely included.) HBO, Netflix, etc….nothing is sacred anymore. And for the MAJORITY of us who are boring and normal, we have to listen to whining and moaning pressed upon us, to fulfill hollyweird’s agendas.

Because of multiple injuries to my husband (a few years ago) and myself-starting six years ago, we have done lots of sitting and watching! He really enjoys television and is one human being who sees the “trend” of mind-bending hollyweird is procuring on the population by unscrupulous and indirect means, through the media. However being a man of relentless strength of character, he sees right through it instead of changing….speaking of which I have a bone to pick with the media.

Millions of people live happily and safely every day, but instead of reporting as I believe it used to be, the things that are picked with a fine tooth comb are the nastiest of events that are either gory or insidious. They are events that work at ripping the fiber of us into shreds, and separating us.

Can’t bitch any more! It is too beautiful a day and I will not waste another moment on trash.
I just PRAY for the children and grandchildren – and for all of us who still live with God’s law guiding us. W have hope for the future. You do not have to be perfect to follow “the good”. I surely have made more mistakes in life than most, but still try to more onward and upward.

The legion of evil is many, but behind and in front, and within each of us, we quietly hold the truth and know the strength we will have in union when the time comes……….

 

 

WELCOME and GOOD MORNING

July 28, 2017

Time is of the essence. Perhaps the written record of one lost life saved, is not going to rescue the masses or feed the hungry. I guess you could say the essence of my life has been God and survival. My story spans the lives of many people in the one earthly body. Time took me from one place to another, sometimes by chance, others by choice, and still others by the hand of God and path provided by Jesus Christ. I am still meandering across my destiny….but now the end of the rocky trail is in my sight.

I know having to take pain medication, to maintain a sense of wholeness, is not good for me.
I keep a tight watch so that I take it and it does not take me. I know taking something to sleep through the night takes a toll on my poor brain, but I need to sleep. My dreams may be affected – or perhaps it is the length and breadth of the story of my life invades me while I sleep.

I want to fly again in my dreams. I remember clearly. I know how from simply standing I elevate and then us my arms and body to maneuver…between the buildings, over the pasture, high above the fabric of incidents that weave the human state on this earth today. It will not be forever that I can’t remember how.

As I close my eyes I want to pray the earnest prayer of grateful appreciation to my Master.
I want, as I drift off to sleep to see the road moving as if I were walking, but I am just above walking….the trees change and are thick and exquisite on the sides and I look ahead unable to tell if it is the sun rising or setting. It is just at the point of color and size that it almost tricks the eyes. But I know today the sun sets with a glow that leaves light along the path.

I know it is setting because before the sun rises the birds awaken and sing first a light and breezy good morning, and then a choir to the morning with a multitude of individual, wonderful birds.

Its as if the sinking of the sun is making way for the fullest of moons to peek, almost melding as the sun sinks, the moon rises to light the sky – in the same place and at the same moment.

I am certain there are a plethora of untapped and unseen resources that can be available for us all, but now for only those who are given the eyes to see and the ears to hear.

Be thee careful of thy words. Words can give life and can harm life. Each word has a meaning and before the words are spoken they a formed with thought. Careless words can rip and tear like a madman with the sharpest of knives.

Of course we can heal. We have been given the best of instruments with specific talents given to no other creatures on this planet. But if given a choice I would rather have a physical injury that one offered up by cruel words. After all the years the physical has healed. The wounds inflicted by unworthy words heal the slowest of all, and will leave a tender scar within the heart…for words alert the heart and senses of what is, perhaps, to come. Be thee careful with thy words.

My intent as I began to write this was actually not to post this…ah but why not! There is no reason to stop now. I still have time and am able! Maybe someone will read and enjoy my words as much as I enjoy writing them! I have high hopes.

Have an amazing day. Stop for one moment and hug yourself. Look into a mirror past what you see, and say -“ I love me, I am supposed to love me. I am God’s one of a kind!. I appreciate all I try to do for others. It always feels good, though it seems there is never enough time.” And if no one said “Thank you” remember the good you do enhances YOU and is for
your growth and well-being. They may not have been taught to say thank you, they may not have thought to say thank you, or they may just be little selfish people – I say little intently.
Your heart and kindness is growing as I write – I just know it!

Love and blessings- Remember I mean things when I say or write or pray the words! So again, LOVE and BLESSINGS to you all! Thanks for taking time to be a part of me.

Don’t forget to praise any attempt from someone to do or say “good.”

Big Dogs are great

July 26, 2017

But for everyone’s sake….take the time and make the effort to train them!

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If you do, you will have a dog that takes care of business – “on command”, and one who simply says, “Don’t bother me I am watching America’s funniest videos!”

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DREAMS, DREAMS, DREAMS

July 25, 2017

Some are amazing and some are not.  Read no further if the latter concerns you.

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I think I would wake less tired if I didn’t have a second life in dreams. Last night was a bad night. My brain, I think, is on “overload” – how many challenges in the day time can one handle, let alone all the wee hours of the night.

Studies reveal dreams are only brief moments before we wake, but I beg to differ with that theory. Step into my head and you will find a lifetime in the shadows of the silent hours of that time which is supposed to regenerate mind and body.

I am exhausted this morning for many reasons. Residual effects of the broken back can sometimes leave me in physical disarray, particularly in the morning after a special day of pain and trials. Some mornings I open my eyes, only to close them, because I know movement will be such a challenge.

This morning I spent the night clearly in the repetitive hell of memory brewing a fresh horror, more like “the continuing story of the nightmares of my life”. I know because I remember everything distinctly. Sometimes for days, sometime for years. I can close my eyes and re-enter the dream exactly where I first transferred from sleep to opening my eyes.

I was in a hotel room. A large hotel that I could peek out the door and look \a long way down the line of rooms…but it wasn’t just a hallway. It was a small street with no vehicles and cobblestone. I was not afraid. It was decent, nice even. Though I remember looking out the window near the bed, and there was an alley or small street, dimly lit. I closed the curtain quickly because wisdom told me it was a better choice than peering into that particular area.

My clothes were hanging neatly in the closet across from the sink. It was next to a locked door that led to the next room. I checked to make sure it was locked.

I write about my dreams for the same reason I always write. I write because I love to do so. I want to share wisdom gained by working through the mucky times, and climbing up the ladder to see clearly all around. It feels like she is prodding me to share some of the help I feel still holds me up from the bottomless lake we all paddle around in for so much of our lives.

I write about the dreams like last night simply to release them from my mind, else wise they would keep activating in my consciousness. I aim to keep them powerless over the present and real strength.

Evil sometimes dies, but the stench of spiritless creatures, particularly if they ended in trauma,
can affect our minds….if we allow them too. For evil is present and gaining strength for the moment……

Rape and abuse are so invasive. They are injuries that are the most difficult to heal, and some of the most heartless attacks on the innocent. So was it for me in that alternate world last night.

None of us are pure. With one exception. However most of us at present do not have evil residing in a permanent place within us. Try as they may, the legion, we have the power to overcome and rise above – ANYTHING.

I was accosted again in this dream. Twisted, and worked like warm clay ready to mold. From the inside of my head the confronter was as clear as this moment and wore a suit of silk and mohair. He seduced me with his presence, for he came in cognate and wore “calm and true”, to once again fool and apprehend me. I knew this evil spirit before but was told years ago he had ended when he committed suicide.

By the time I recognized evil it was almost too late. Much of the dream need not be revealed. There is an abundance of horror presented to us every day as “news”. Use your mind to create offensive and abrupt deliverance of evil, if you so choose, or give it only a flip of a thought and move forward with me in this dream I hope I won’t visit again.

A change of time and I found myself loading the gun I carried with me. Sitting outside under a small tree was the creature void of any good spirit – Evil once again sat with someone else (he had already molested a child, and an elderly couple). There are many methods of molestation and all are evil. He was still wearing the suit of silk and mohair.

The most insidious crime of evil is involving a child.

I took out the gun, loaded and cocked it and aimed my shot. I still hear it whirring through the air. I thought it was targeted as a direct hit, a hit to kill, but apparently I was off just a hair as when the ambulance came I saw his head lift slightly and his eyes open for a moment as they carried him off. Another “someone” he fooled, was walking next to him. He was adoring him, fully engulfed in his deceit.

The next moment I found myself tearing clothes off the hangers and throwing things into a suitcase. I knew I would be blamed and with only a few understanding, would be taken off to be imprisoned.

My sister appeared and she knew. As I stopped for a moment I took a breath and closed my eyes. When I opened them I was laying in bed stiff from the pain, from the tips of my toes to the bottom of my head. I closed my eyes and returned….I opened my eyes and jolted up…..trying to breathe and relax those permanently injured parts of this human body. I walked to the kitchen. Stopped to say hello to the dog, got a cup of coffee, and here I sit, finishing the record of my dream life when asleep.

I am better now. Releasing is urgent so as not to have a buildup of evil residing from within.
I am fortunate to have faith in the power given to me by the Holy Spirit. It is real and as I activate the power through breathing in new life, I deactivate evil by now placing it far away and behind me.

Onward and upward I go.

Human Intelligence or Not?

July 11, 2017

Human intelligence fluctuates with habits. We become what we hear, see, and are told.
You have to dumb down to be fixated on what the advertisers are selling. The perfect face, the perfect body, perfect sex, the perfect home, the perfect toy, the perfect wardrobe, perfect furnishings and electronics, the perfect car, and so forth.

Really? Do we really need to buy because the money machine tells us to do so? Buy it all and then die young from the stress in trying to pay for everything. This is not a joke.
Stress kills.

Do you really think it is entertainment to go to the mall with your children? Where is the hell did you get that idea? Oh, never mind, I know.

Black Friday – REALLY? Grey Thursday? Let me grab my wallet and go buy a bunch of prettily packaged up JUNK made IN CHINA. It will last long enough to get the next model of stuff out so your new purchases will be outdated.

This year, just for fun, I am giving some of my FAVORITE things to my family. Why wait for them to get it until I am dead? Of course that may be years (I hope) – but I want them to enjoy some things I love the most NOW.

Material things come and go. Love is forever.

Thank you!

July 7, 2017

Photograph taken in Corvallis Oregon.  Added just for a reminder that there is still beauty all around us!

fullsizeoutput_5aI am nothing without love, and nothing without my faith of the Unseen Spiritual Power and Creator of it all. His presence is within me, flooding me with a will to live and the power to carry on, no matter what the future appears to be.

He holds me up, pushes me along, and gives me the encouragement to keep trying. I see Jesus struggling along the path, having done nothing but love and enlighten, being tortured as he marched to His grisly end on the planet, for a time.

His time with His creations should have been filled with intense love and trust. That baby boy, to grow to be a man, was filled with curiosity and kindness. He did no wrong to anyone. His faith in His Father was unshaken, and yet He was tortured and ridiculed for never denying his heritage and position as the leader of love and forgiveness.

My time is limited. Just when I feel I am not qualified to even accept the Grace offered as a full bounty, I am reminded by someone I love that I am His child still.

I must move WITH grace, having been given this gift freely. I must accept that because He stills sings in my heart, without me ever touching Him, He touches me, and still moves me to tears because of the thought of His love for me..for all His creations. I must accept that no matter what, He wants me with him forever…and you.

All my flaws, all my insecurities, all the times of strife I let this world almost get the better of me. He has never left my heart and my mind. He stands steadfast with me amidst the horrors of the world and will always be my shield and source.

I am ever grateful for His subtle and enduring love that moves me back to Him again with just mere words. I am forever of His mind and Love, and forgive, even myself, for my sometimes awkward and inept words and ways. For those times I let evil grasp me and fool me.

Once again I am empowered and able to move with grace and beauty. I simply awoke and I am transformed again. Create a beautiful day. Fill it with love and forgiveness. Each moment we are able to forgive and begin again!

We should all love one another, even if just in an act of kindness. Smile for no reason. See the beauty of each individual. Take a breath and believe YOU are able to change your world, and the worlds of those who are a part of you life…even if you simply pass by in the market. You are in charge. Use the innate power that fills the space in your heart saved only for God and Godly things. For heavens sake, and the sake our being – hug someone! I love you.

Marsha